They say that opposites attract and the two poles of the magnet, positive and negative, do attract each other and form a strong bond. Such attraction may be fine for magnets, and it's what makes a compass work, but when it comes to people's personalities positive and negative need to be kept apart. Nobody needs a magnetic relationship if it's going to cause problems for one or both of the people in the relationship.

Some people have a positive outlook on life, the optimists. Others have a negative outlook on life, the pessimists. There are times when each of us feels optimistic or pessimistic depending on the situation in which we find ourselves. Yet our overriding personality type is either optimistic or pessimistic.

The person's disposition to be positive or negative in their outlook has a profound effect on the way they deal with many of the issues that arise in a relationship. The optimist's reaction to having a small bump in the car is going to be quite different to the pessimist's. The optimist may see a small pay rise at work has a great bonus, while the pessimist may see it as a slap in the face. Forgetting to go to the shops and having nothing in to eat could be seen by the optimist is a great opportunity to go out for a meal, while for the pessimist it could be an action bordering on neglect.

If you're an optimistic person you will want to surround yourself with optimistic, positive people. You will probably find it uncomfortable to be around negative people. Yet it can be difficult in the first stages of a relationship to establish if your potential mate is a positive person like yourself or a negative person. During the early romantic rush of infatuation we tend to view the world through distorting rose-coloured spectacles. Your potential partner's negativity will be submerged beneath an upswell of positive romantic attachment.

Many positive people find that when they're around negative people that positive energy is drained by the negativity of the other. It's almost as if the negative draws down the positive energy in an attempt to reach equilibrium. Typically what happens is that the negative energy so drains the positive that the positive personality finds themselves desperate to escape to somewhere where they can rebuild their positive energy reserves.

Often in a relationship the positive partner finds ways to escape from the negative partner in order to re-new their depleted positivity. They escape to play golf or football on the weekend, or they may stay late at work, preferring to busy their optimistic natures in work rather than have two face yet another drain on their positivity by returning home. While this may work for a while, perhaps even for many years, eventually the negative drain on the positive individual will prove too great and the relationship will come to an end.

Whenever you're embarking on a new relationship it's vitally important to establish that you are both compatible as regards your level of positivity. An overly positive, blindly optimistic type will find it very difficult to form a lasting relationship with somebody whose negativity and pessimism will stymie their own positivity. There are some ways you can ensure that the person with whom you are planning a relationship, be it a personal relationship, a business relationship, or a professional relationship, is a suitable match.

Begin by asking your potential partner some questions about things that are important to yourself. If your partner gives answers that you yourself would give this is a good indication that your positivity is of a similar level. Engineer some situations that will test your partner's reaction to difficulty or crisis. Tell them that you've lost your wallet after taking them out from meal and ask if they wouldn't mind paying for the meal. Arrive at the station a few minutes late and watch your partner's reaction to missing the train and having to purchase new tickets. Pretend to have locked yourself out of your house when it's pouring with rain and there's nowhere else to go.

These "tests" may seem bizarre or even risky, but if you're planning on spending the rest of your life or at least a good proportion of the rest of your life with another person, you can never be too sure. While people can change their opinions about things, and even their beliefs, and may change their stance even on issues of great importance, one thing they will never change is their level of positivity or negativity. If your potential partner's reactions are as positive as your own would be, you can be more sure that they share your positivity.

When it comes to dating, whether in the real world, or through an online dating agency, it's vitally important that the attraction you feel is not an attraction of opposites but an attraction of equals. If you fail to ensure this, whatever magnetic attraction you initially enjoy you will sooner or later find your differences repelling each other and you will once again find yourself searching for a new relationship.