Throughout millions of romantic stories people have witness the perfect, fairytale kisses that seem to bring out romance regardless of how the rest of the story has played out. Many people tend to overlook a kiss as either a beginning to more physical interaction or an ending to time spent together. It may be of interest to some that a single kiss can have such a lasting effect on a person that it can completely change their feelings towards an individual.
How can a kiss be so important? In our society a kiss represents something that can be even more personal than having sex; the style and manor in which a kiss is carried out indicates a great deal about the person. While some of the signals sent might be interpreted in different ways by different people there are many that are commonly assumed and for that reason can be helpful, or harmful in a romantic encounter.
To begin with a kiss does not start when two people press their lips together; the build up to that moment will often affect greatly how the kiss is perceived. Many different kinds of feelings can be felt just before the moment a kiss takes place; from hearty laughter to a very revealing admission, these kinds of stirrings can change the way a kiss is felt and later remembered. Setting the scene and knowing when the opportune moment comes for that perfect kiss can be difficult. In many cases what is intended is not what takes place and as a result some awkward head bumping or accidental placement can occur. It is important, especially for a first kiss, to go in slow and make sure that the person you are about to kiss seems willing. There are signs that will allow you to gauge whether or not a kiss would be welcome and if you take this moment slowly, you are given the opportunity to change your mind if you become aware of some negative results approaching.
Some of the most opportune settings:
?Right after sharing a good laugh
?After something meaningful has been revealed
?During a romantic movie or situation
?After an argument has come to a conclusion
?During a highly emotional or passionate moment you share
?After sharing or receiving good news
?After an exciting, perhaps even dangerous, experience
?During a moment when you feel especially connected to the person
?When saying goodbye
Once you have decided that the situation is right, the next step is to make sure the kiss is right, not only for the mood, but for the person. There are many different types of kisses that are appropriate for different situations. For example: If choosing to kiss during a romantic moment you may want to, at least begin slowly and gently. An aggressive kiss at the wrong moment may prove to be complete turn-off even when a kiss is welcome. On the other hand, when sharing a moment where both you and your intended are experiencing high adrenaline rushes and a great deal of emotional excitement a more aggressive kiss may prove to be the very thing. Though it may seem difficult when trying to plan for the right kiss, often the moment and interaction create a clear path to the right choice as long as you are careful enough to read the signals that the other person is giving you. For those especially difficult situations when you may not be sure it may prove useful to rely on a few standard types of behavior that indicate a person is ready to be kissed:
?Moving closer to you
?Touching a part of you that is perhaps not sexual, but intimate
?Staring into your eyes
?Touching their own lips because they perhaps hoping this will make you notice them
?Leans towards you in such a way that it would make them easier to kiss
If after paying very close attention you still feel unsure about how you should proceed you can always ask the person in a clever or especially romantic way. Many women especially find this question both endearing and respectful and it may prove to be the very way to assure that you are heading in the direction with your relationship.
Few things disrupt a wonderful date more than a terrible kiss and those truly horrible ones are well remembered. Not only does a terrible kiss often indicate that any other physical activity might prove to be less than satisfying it also sends a message out of incompatibility. An awkward moment does not necessarily ruin a kiss and can be circumvented with good humor, but this requires a great deal of sensitivity toward the feelings of the other person, in short, you must pay attention to their physical reactions. It can be difficult to prepare for a kissing disaster as each person is unique, but there are a few styles which are commonly regarded as less than desirable:
?Too much tongue: Remember that when the time is right your tongue can be a welcome part of the kiss, but there is no prize for attempting to shove it in the other person's mouth. Some people seem to get too excited during a kiss and in doing so, get far too aggressive with their tongues. This style is often a turn-off and completely ruins any physical attractions that were taking place. You may have heard this referred to as ?how does my stomach taste? or ?trying to lick my stomach.? In either case, not a very attractive image for most people.
?Smashed: People often press against each other when sharing a very passionate kiss; in some cases a person may even hold the neck or face in their hand(s) during the kiss. During these types of kisses it can be easy to become overwhelmed and to forget that you now have the other person's head trapped between your face and hand. Pushing too hard with either can turn a kiss from passionate to claustrophobic in seconds and may even get a semi aggressive push back from the other person.
?Peck: Often during the first kiss people tend to be a little nervous and this can result in a quick movement that has almost no passion or feeling and only achieves the goals of your lips meeting the other person's. If you feel that uncomfortable kissing the person it may help to wait until a time when you feel more at ease rather than to make a disaster of your first physical encounter. A quick peck on the lips can indicate that you do not desire the person greatly and may even send the impression that you are not physically attracted to them at all. Make sure that if you are getting a negative reaction from this kind of kiss that you follow it with either another kiss that is a little more tender and romantic or some other form of physical contact to reassure the person you are with.
?Can't Breathe: Always remember how ever well the kissing is going to allow the other person the space to breathe. If you plaster yourself to the other person's face and do not allow for tiny breaks in the kiss where either of you can draw breath this may result in an uncomfortably loud snort or intake of breath through the nose which can seem comical. Though this may not greatly affect your future relationship as in many cases it will be amusing, it can destroy a passionate mood.
Always be sure that you allow yourself to adapt to the other person's style of kissing so that together you can find a middle ground. Most people agree that throughout their relationships they learned many different ways to kiss and some were liked far more than others by different partners. Be sure to remain aware of your partner's reactions to any physical move that you make at all times; this kind of attentive behavior will help to make you a better kisser and in doing so, a better lover for the rest of your life.