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To A Beautiful Woman
Josh Stivenson
There are attractive women, and then there are really beautiful women. They're the ones who walk into a room and everyone notices the change in atmosphere. They're the women who have looks, personality, and charm – they could be supermodels if they wanted to be. Women of this type are only interested in men of quality, and even if you've done a lot of work toward honing your quality, capturing the attention of a woman in this category is a tricky and delicate process.
Consider the typical way a man approaches a woman. He sees her and is attracted to her. He walks over to her, buys her a drink, and chats her up. He compliments her on her beauty or some aspect of her pesonality. If he gets that far, he buys her dinner. She humors him because she's getting free stuff, but she already knows that he's the needy sort. Why? Because his actions tell her that he feels that he has to earn her attention with money and compliments because he's not able to meet that need just by being himself. And another well-intentioned man falls to the axe of "You're really nice, but..."
Compliments and money are both good tools to use in attracting a lady, but it's a delicate balance that can only be learned through practice and proper balance with engaging her emotions. Women are not as impressed by money and looks as they are by how a man makes her feel. A man can be good-looking and financially secure, but if he makes a woman feel like an object rather than a person, she will sent him packing.
Remember: attraction is a snap judgment. The first thirty seconds are the most important to a good response, and most attraction occurs in the first three minutes of contact. If you demonstrate to the lady of your choosing that you don't need the acceptance of her or any other individual to make your life complete, you have a better chance of getting her attraction because you've presented a respectable thing to be attracted to. You're already complete. You're just looking for someone to share your completeness with, and it could be her.
Remember this as well: there are more attractive women in the world than you can meet in a lifetime, so you really don't need any woman's approval. In fact, any lady you've got your eye on needs your approval, and you'll come across as more attractive to her if you find a subtle way to communicate that. Women don't want to be the ones carrying a relationship. They want to be the one being carried. They want someone with greater social worth than themselves to be her host in the social sphere. If you can demonstrate that you're such a man, she's more likely to want you around.
There are a few ways to entice a woman into being attracted to you, but for now, let's focus on a simple – and completely counterintuitive – technique for demonstrating your higher social worth. Instead of approaching a woman and giving her a compliment, find a way to give her an insult – a 'backhanded compliment.' Play it off as funny so you don't come off as a total pig. For instance, if a woman is wearing a nice shirt, compliment her on how nice it looks and ask if she bought it new. Chances are, she'll start telling you how it was a gift from her friend or she got it on sale and how much of a good bargain it was. Why? Because you've demonstrated that you're a little bit nosy but not in a bad way, and that you're not intimidated by the fact that she looks amazing. It's completely counterintuitive, but it's proven to work.
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