A thought creeps in repeatedly, whether you like it or not, would start exercising great influence on you. Your feelings are determined by the nature of such thoughts irrespective of you entertain within your mind or they coming to you without your permission. No doubt, you do not want to develop a negative feeling and put yourself down. However, there are times when you can't help yourself to feel better. This means that you need to challenge your negative thoughts if you want to feel great.
Every emotion is associated with a corresponding thought. If I say that I feel sad, there should be an associated thought behind this feeling. It is easy to find the associated thought by completing the statement: ?I feel sad because I think...? The completed statement might be: ?I feel sad because I think nobody loves me?. What is the catch? The completed statement that indicates your thought is causing the distress. When you think that nobody loves you, whether it is a fact or not, you feel sad. This implies that changing the thought should help one to feel differently. How to change the negative thought that coming to you without your permission? Yes, it is very hard to say ?no? to such thoughts. Even if you know that such negative thoughts are not helping you in any way, they simply come in only to cause more distress and eventually to lead you to clinical depression.
Be In Charge!
When you are in danger, either you can fight back to dominate the danger or run away from the danger. When it is a negative thought that is causing stress, you cannot run away because the thought is inside your mind and wherever you go, your mind follows you, eventually, the thought as well. Some people find temporary relief by deliberately distracting their mind towards something more enjoyable or interesting. But, it is hard to distract your mind every time the thought coming to your mind, and also it won't guarantee a permanent escape from the negative thought. So, the best strategy is to fight back. To be in charge! But how?
Psychotherapists rely on Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) in order to help clients to fight back the negative thoughts by challenging their negative thoughts. The negative thoughts would be logically tested with reality so that the paranoid mind gets clarity on the meaninglessness of such thoughts, which many clients admit as ?crazy ideas? or ?stupid thoughts? once they see the real picture. Another method of fighting back is by simply replacing the associated negative thought with a counter script which is a positive one. ?I feel happy because I know that everybody loves me? would be a counter script to the previously stated negative statement. Hypnosis or hypnotherapy is another alternative in order to register positive ego strengthening script within the mind. Guided imagery methods are yet another effective and powerful therapeutic method help the clients to get rid of the negative anticipation and worries.
Some Tips to Challenge the Negative Thoughts
1. You may feel sad or worried because of the negative thoughts. Just remember that it is the way you think. It doesn't mean it is true.
2. Try to be aware of what you are saying to yourself when you are feeling bad, sad or worried. Replace that negative thought with a positive one.
3. Challenge the reasonableness of your negative thoughts.
4. Find time to enjoy your life. Listening to music, reading a good novel, watching pleasurable programs on television, aerobics, going out, visiting places, taking a break from work, shopping, etc. are some of the options you could try.
5. Socialize with your peer groups. Share your worries with someone whom you can trust the most.
6. Do not feel embarrassed to talk to a Counselor or Psychotherapist. They are genuine persons who are specifically trained in this area. You will feel much better if you take the counseling or psychotherapy session voluntarily.