If you are fortunate enough to have parents who live to a ripe old age, you may be faced with the challenge of ensuring their ongoing care and well being. As the baby boomer generation reaches their golden years, parent care is becoming a priority for their children. Unfortunately, with many families needing two incomes, it is not often possible for sons and daughters to take care of their aging parents.

Even families who are able to care for their parents sometimes face unforeseen stresses. Healthy and loving relationships can become strained as lifestyles need to be altered and stress levels rise.

Unforeseen responsibilities and changing roles are at the root of many of the problems that arise when caring for parents. The level of care that's needed is also a factor. If your parents need your care, chances are their level of self-sufficiency is low and you must look after most or all of their day-to-day needs.

It's the daily grind of constant care that becomes one of the biggest sources of stress for the caregiver. Not being able to come and go as needed or not being able to plan anything with certainty leads to feelings of helplessness and being trapped. It's at these low points where strains can show in relationships. Caregivers might take out some of the frustration and anxiety on parents. Even the caregiver's family might suffer the consequences of high stress levels. Husbands, wives, sons, daughters, brothers and sisters might all suddenly experience strains in their relationship with the caregiver.

However, it's not only the caregiver who can experience stress. Anxiety, frustration and despair are just a few of the stresses faced by parents who are under the care of their children. Roles are reversed and, after a lifetime of caring and mentoring their children, parents now must become cared for and can't do without their children's help. No parent wants to be a burden on their children or to give up their independence. In addition, the uncertainty of their situation and illness compounds any problems parents face while receiving care.

Even before deciding whether or not a parents need care, children and other family members must look for the signs that parents are no longer able to look after themselves. This in itself can be a source of strain in a relationship as parents might feel imposed upon and children might not know the implications of certain parent behaviour.

In any case, if there is any reason to suspect that a parent might need care, you should look for other signs to confirm your suspicions and help determine your best course of action. If children are not living with parents, the first noticeable sign might be a change personality, mood swings or unusual irritability. A decline in grooming and personal hygiene are also outward signs that intervention might be needed.

You have good reason to investigate further if you spot any or all of these signs. Look for any unusual deterioration in physical skills such as difficulty walking or standing steadily, poor driving skills or persistent lack of energy. When you visit your parents, be alert for signs of poor housekeeping, spoiled food or unopened mail. Memory loss, lack of interest and loss of appetite are also signs that parent care is needed.

Whether or not your family has the time, resources and facilities to take care of your parents, the stresses and potential relationship damage that can occur mean that you should consider alternative parent care options.

While there are many good institutions for seniors in Toronto and the GTA, and they provide all levels of care, most people would rather not put their parents in a ?home? unless it is medically necessary. In home parent care is an alternative that gives your parents the dignity and security that comes with receiving care in the comfort of their own home. In home care allows you to concentrate on your parents? well-being in an atmosphere unstrained by the stresses of changed relationships. An in-home caregiver becomes a companion and confidant for your parents and is your trusted source of information about your parent's health and well-being.

The in home parent care specialists at Qualicare are registered nurses and Personal Support Workers who are specially trained and qualified to provide the home health care that your parents need.