The troublesome mother-in-law is well known as the bane of any young family's blissful relationship. When it comes to situations regarding finances, bringing up the kids, or maybe even general day to day living, there always seems to be arguments between you and the 'in-laws'. Mother-in-laws seem to have a habit of thinking that their opinion is just as important, or more so than your partners, when that really isn't the case. Naturally they care about the happiness of their extended family, but rarely know the full details of the situation " and sometimes shouldn't shed their opinion.

There are certain times to laugh these disagreements off, but for the remaining no-laughter circumstances when lines have been crossed, how do we keep our composure while making our point?

Calmly evaluate the reasons you choose to do what you do, as standing up for your viewpoint is essential. Even when backed into a corner, know what you need to say, and say them. Stating what's on your mind will show others that you care about the discussion, especially since it's *your* family. You should understand though, they won't wont back down so easily, just like you. The end goal should be a mutual agreement, or at least agree to disagree.

Staying quiet, but still angry underneath can indicate to others that you're either too timid, or agree with what they're saying! This may give the wrong impression, and invite them to make further distasteful comments. Even if you haven't come to a decision, and don't feel the need to speak up yet, it is an idea to at least let them know you're still thinking.

Comments coming from a meddling in-law may have double-meaning (sounds constructive on the surface but can appear to be full of rude criticism underneath - think Marie from Everybody Loves Raymond). These situations can turn into heated arguments if youre not careful.

Use diplomacy at all times. Be the better person, and refuse to sink to the levels of reciprocal insulting (remember, the comment may not have been intended to insult in the first place). If you know for sure that the remark was definitely intended to hurt you, there are two choices you can follow: first, don't allow the offender to take any satisfaction from what they said. Do this by trying your hardest not to react at all. Second, just tell them that you didn't appreciate the way they put it, and hope they weren't trying to undermine you. Never get angry.

Others should also know, that although suggestions of organizing finances or raising the children are listened to, it may be the fact that you're doing the best you can right now, with the resources you have. Mention that although their solution worked for them in their situation, it may not be suitable for everyone.

Whatever you do, please remember that its much easier to tackle meddling in-laws with upfront, polite honesty than it is with yelling insults back and forth.