Tough times are a big part of what makes us successful, as survivors and leaders. Getting through them effectively and positively depends on how we treat that space. Our personal survival tools go a long way to getting us through tough times. Some may call them coping tools - they're much more than that. We're talking about tools to help us stay positive and focused and optimistic.

Developing powerful survival tools starts with the realization that what you expect is what you get. Think positive expectations and get more than your share of them. But most of us are conditioned to think pessimistically - to expect the worst outcome. Take a look at all the media inputs we get every day for one major source of our negative conditioning.

So how do we overcome all the negative inputs directed at us every day, and create our own survival and success tools? The answer to that question is a very personal one - every one of us has our own unique set of experiences, perceptions, values and attitudes, and they all drive how we will create our own tools. The important thing is to create your own tools, and keep them shiny with use.

Here are a dozen suggestions from many of the leaders we have worked with that have helped them with their tough times.

Realize that "this too shall pass." During tough times it's hard to see any light at the end of the tunnel. It's there - be convinced of it - but you gotta look for it and work toward it.

Avoid negative influences and their effects - the news, the toxic people you may have to associate with, drugs and alcohol. Seek out positive people and messages - wherever you can find them.

Express your goals and expectations in positive ways - focus on where you're going, not what you want to stay away from.

Know that giving in to despair and pessimism is very human - even the most positive do that. It's the overcoming of those emotions through action that lifts you up.

Ask for help. Realize that the highest order of relationships is interdependence. Most people are anxious to give - if we let them know by asking. We can't assume others know what is going on in our heads - they don't.

Give without calculating return. Nothing can help to get through tough times more than helping someone else get through their tough times. Giving comes in so many different ways - but you know it when you see it.

Don't compare. It's easy to fall into the trap of seeing others who seem to be on top of the world, and feeling envious toward them. A human emotion, but destructive. Realize that everyone of us carries around our own burdens - who are we to judge the weight of another's?

Kick start every day by creating positive space. A friend starts his days with high energy, positive music. He gets up with positive energy and a head start on positive emotions. I have written about Ray Stevens song "Everything Is Beautiful In Its Own Way." I hear that song and it just lifts me up - makes me smile - gives me a blast of positive energy.

Dream - just don't dream of things that never were or never will be. Dreams are a sign of hope - a precious commodity during the tough times we all face. As Rudyard Kipling wrote in his famous poem "If" - "If you can dream, and not let dreams become your master."

Start and end every day with a success - as you define success. The very act of getting up and getting going can be a success - each of us has to define what success is. But be convinced that in every day there are the seeds of success - and look for them. Exercise is a great daily success - it's personal, requires action, and results in physical well being.

Create rewards. They don't have to be big, but they are your own recognition of a job well done - a day well spent - fears faced and overcome. Many leaders find keeping a journal of accomplishments and challenges helps them reward themselves by writing it down.

If you see ways these suggestions can help during tough times - and - by the way - during non- tough times as well, then start using them today.