How to Fix a Broken Marriage

By: Karl Augustine

How to Fix a Broken Marriage
Fixing a marriage problem or worst a broken marriage can be agonizing, especially if you are trying to do all you can to make your marriage work. It can be a hurtful time if you don't take a step back and look at your marriage problem from a 'helicopter' viewpoint. Before you can attempt to fix your broken marriage, your need to identify the problems causes. 

Indentifying Marriage Problems
The first step to fixing a broken marriage is to identify the common causes of marriage problems.

  • 1) Lack of Intimacy
    A serious issue that you must work if your going to work it out. If you guys are not making out and having an intimate relationship, it will be a challenge to fix your marriage.
  • 2) Exploding during an Argument
    Getting too emotional and letting your temper get the best of you - you need to learn to work together and you can't do that if one of you is getting too heated.
  • 3) Being Selfish
    Eventually this will catch up to you. You should always think of your partner when you think of yourself.
  • 4) Being Dishonest
    Another serious issue. If you cannot be 100% honest and open with your mate, your marriage is most likely doomed or at the very least unhappy.
  • 5) Teasing Too Much
    Generally the husband does this but it could go either way. If there's a little bit of truth to the teasing or there's a greater marriage problem that incites the teasing, you could be in for a long road to recovery together. Chances are that you will have a lot more work to do to correct this marriage problem.
  • 6) Not Respecting Your Spouse
    This marriage problem can result in all types of other problems. If you are experiencing this you must get to the root of this and figure out why the disrespect is present. If you aren't getting the every day respect that you deserve, make it a priority to not let this go on another day.
  • 7) Not Listening or Attentive to Your Spouse
    Men are usually guilty of this marriage problem but is isn't exclusive to the weaker gender by any means. Really listening doesn't mean obeying, it means understanding what is important to your spouse and acting accordingly.

Obviously there are many other things that could be labeled a 'marriage problem', you have to decide what those are as they pertain to your situation.

  • If you are the only one who sees the said action as a marriage problem, you have to decide whether or not that specific marriage problem is being caused by you or whether it is truly a problem brought on by your spouse.
  • You'll be a better person for it because you will have fixed something within yourself.
  • Prolonged by your spouse, sit down with yourself first and examine what you believe to be the root cause of the behavior that creates the marriage problem. Make sure that you are being logical when you identify the behavior that you feel is causing the marriage problem and try to recall if the traits or behavior that you have identified in your spouse are 'fixable' in your mind...assuming of course, that your spouse will agree that you are right.

Once you have identified that you are not the cause

  • 1) Approach your Spouse
    Talk to him with the information that you have reflected on and try to talk through the cause of the marriage problem. Hopefully your spouse will be open to constructive discussion regarding the marriage problem so you can work through it together.
  • 2) Seek a Mediator or Marriage Counselor
    If you cannot do work on the marriage problem together, seek the help of a mediator or marriage counselor so you can actually talk out the marriage problem logically.

If you cannot work it out after counseling, deep self-reflection and discussions, you should be able to decide whether or not the marriage problem warrants a divorce or not. Of coursePsychology Articles, no one can decide this but you. 

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