There are a lot of different self-defense classes offered. Every martial arts school, every fitness club and even some personal trainers offer self-defense classes. How are you supposed to know what is top and what is flop?
Always keep in mind the following two facts:
1. Your opponent is stronger than you!
2. You only have 2 seconds to react!
Your opponent is stronger than you! Always! It does not matter how strong you are, how fast you can punch or how many boards you can break. If someone would choose to attack you, that someone will be stronger. Think about it. An attacker is always looking for a victim, and victims are supposed to be weaker. Or would you attack someone who is stronger than you are and challenge him to a fight? Certainly not.
You only have two seconds to react in a fight! A realistic fight only last about two seconds. And the only thing that keeps you safe, are your reflexes. If you have good reflexes (and useful in a fight) you will be safe. If your reflexes are useless, you will loose. It's as simple as that. If a fight last longer than two seconds, than both "fighters" don't know what they are doing. This "2-second-Rule" is also the reason why some people (even black belts) with martial arts training freeze in a fight. They didn't know what to do. The attack was so fast that they didn't know what just happened.
And for all of you who think martial arts training has nothing to do with today's stressful lifestyle, think again. The reflexes that keep you safe in a physical fight are the same reflexes that allow you to manage and control high stress situations. This is very important. Read it again. The reflexes that keep you safe in a physical fight are the same reflexes that allow you to manage and control high stress situations.
A physical fight is a high stress situation, especially for someone with no training. I am sure you had some sort of that experience at some point in your childhood. If you lost that fight you probably think fighting is horrible. On the other hand, if you won that fight, you felt great and empowered. You also carry this event with you and it was great. You probably understand better than anyone else that you have to stand up for what you believe. Competition is part of our daily life. We compete with everything and everyone. And usually the people who say out loud that fighting and competition is bad for us and our children are the one's who compete the most.
The ability to defend yourself does not make you a bully, it makes you a warrior. You get up every morning with a purpose. You know why you go to work. You challenge your colleagues at the office, your partners and vendors, definitely your competitors and sometimes even your boss. And what's wrong with that? You challenge them because you have a vision, a goal and you need to stand up for that. Imagine for a moment, that you invented a great product that could make the lives of millions of people much easier. You are trying to find people to turn this invention into reality and nobody is able to see your vision. You let your dream slide and eventually give up on it. Then, one day, you see your idea turned into reality by someone else. Someone else has been more persistent than you were. Someone else found a way to make it happen and people will remember someone else's name and not yours. How does this make you feel now?
Common martial arts teach you a collection of techniques that usually don't work in reality. But that does not mean that there is no alternative available. Keep looking and you will find what you want and need. It all depends on how much you want it.