Look for the Positives

by : Gene Simmons

Our lives are overflowing with negative information from the newspapers, magazines, television and radio. Nations are at war, thousands are dying of starvation and hundreds are killed by natural disasters. There is no avoiding or ignoring the facts. We even receive negativity from our own families and friends every single day.

How we deal with this information is up to us. One, we can absorb it all and allow it to negatively dominate our thoughts, emotions, attitudes and our day-to-day lives. Or two, we can view these events as an unfortunately "normal" part of our existence and concentrate on those things we can do something about - such as our own personal lives and how we can positively affect and influence ourselves and those around us. In fact, if we dwell on the negatives around us and constantly reinforce them with our thoughts and words, our lives will tend to be mostly negative. "Bad" things are more likely to keep happening to us.

Instead, if we change our focus to the good things of life - the positives - there is an above average chance that things will get much better. Negatives fill our emotional bucket quickly and before we know it, they are spilling all over ourselves and those around us. Isn't it far more logical to fill our bucket with positives? The people around us are sure to be much more receptive to any spillage the might occur.

Try this. Make a "Gratitude Check". Take some time for yourself and write down the good things in your life or the things you enjoy and appreciate. Start with the fact that you woke up this morning, then go from there. No matter how bad your situation is, if you try just a little you'll have several hundred items on our list. A helpful hint - keep the list handy and add to it as you think of other things. There will always be days when your list will come in handy to give you a pick-me-up.

Be selective about what you read, watch on TV and the music you listen to. Think about the information your mind is absorbing and determine whether it' s really good for you. Be selective with your friends and pay attention to the conversations you are having. Is the relationship - or the conversation - based on negative words and feelings? Would you be better off changing the subject - or finding someone different to spend your time with?

Watch your "self talk". This is the imaginary conversations we have with ourselves and others, especially when there are potential conflicts on the horizon. Stop "badmouthin'" the people in your life and stop badmouthin' yourself! Every time we do that, we are reinforcing to ourselves just how miserable the world is and how unfortunate we are.

Look for the positives in everything that happens in your life, no matter how bad they seem at the time. Life is filled with lessons and the potential for each of us to learn, especially from the uncomfortable situations. Pay attention. Learn as quickly as possible so these lessons need not be repeated.