Who usually wins in the 'power struggle' between you and your child?

When this little girl starts crying, her father uses breaks through the noise to ask questions that the girl feels compelled to answer despite her emotional distress.

To answer the questions, she'd have to stop crying.

Easy, but so, so brilliant. 

It might not work for your child, so here are some other proven methods.

*Note: The following methods are for children who are screaming/crying/wailing when they are angry, upset and basically throwing a temper tantrum because they didn't get what they want; not meant for children crying or screaming because they are excited, happy or frightened (example: saw a spider).

If you're wondering why your child constantly cries so much for no apparent reason, the root cause might be because his/her cries brought them love and attention from you when they were a baby.

At the moment, they don't know what other 'mature' way to ask for affection/help besides crying. Sometimes crying is simply just a plea for attention, so just remember to pay attention to them prior the crying, and not as a 'reward' for crying.

Now, when your child is making a huge fuss and starts to cry or scream, ignoring them will not help because it does not teach the appropriate behavior. Neither will spanking, as that has the potential to cause adverse effects for the child down the road.

Lastly, do not give in to the screaming; that will just reinforce the child's thinking that hey, this method is super effective! I'll keep using it to get my way!

One woman who was at her utter wit's end decided to do the unthinkable - by dropping onto the floor in the mall and started imitating her screaming, kicking and flailing daughter. Sure, she did get a lot of strange stares from other shoppers, but it also almost instantly ceased her daughter's screaming. The little girl was bewildered and shocked by her mother's impromptu performance, and did not attempt screaming again.

That sure sounds crazy, but we suppose that desperate times comes for desperate measures.

Another effective method is to tell your child that he or she is not screaming/wailing/crying loud enough when they throw a temper tantrum. (Once again, we emphasize that it's not during the times they are thrilled or scared but during a manipulative tantrum)

'Louder please, I can't hear you very well'.

When the child does scream louder, keep repeating the question. (*use ear plugs if necessary) They will stop when they 1) get tired, 2) finally realized that shouting won't help them get what they want or 3) decide to disobey your request and rebel by NOT screaming.

Also remember to praise or reward them when they do not cry/throw a tantrum the next time when they do not get what they want. It doesn't sound much but it can be encouraging to a child. After all, who dislikes being praised?

What other methods (not listed above) do you use to effectively soothe your crying child or stop them from throwing a tantrum?

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We fully understand how tough it is to be a parent, but rest assured that your efforts are worth it! Your child will be appreciative of your hard work in the future!

For all the hard-working parents, don't forget to reward yourself too once in a while! After a hard day's work of work or looking after the children, take a break, and enjoy a relaxing shoulder/neck/back massage!

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