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[H971]How To Communicate Better
by Peter Murphy, Pet
Babies learn to speak through listening. We learn about things we do not know about through listening. So having effective listening skills can make you able to communicate better. You can learn how to communicate better through listening skills if you know the basics about listening.

The following four sections explain the key points to being a good listener and why they are important to communication.

1. Use body language to show you are listening.

Not only will body language show you are listening, but it will also help you to listen better. If you move closer you can hear better and not be distracted as easily. If you maintain eye contact you will be less likely to be distracted by something you see around you.

Also avoid fidgeting as this can show your lack of interest or that you are getting bored.

2. Repeating back parts of what someone has said to you shows them you listened.

It also helps you to comprehend what was said better. If you misunderstood this will let the speaker know and then it can be clarified. You also show you are interested by taking their words and repeating them back. It shows you were really focused on what they said.

3. Focus on the person speaking.

You should be giving you undivided attention to the person speaking. This means you are not looking for something in your purse, glancing around the room or doing some other task during a conversation.

If you are even slightly distracted you may miss something the person says or be at risk of misunderstanding them.

4. Do not interrupt the person speaking.

You should hear the other person out and wait for a break in the conversation to ask questions or express your point of view. Interrupting only shows you are more interested in your own thoughts than theirs.

These tips basically cover the ways to be a good listener. There are various takes on what is required to be a good listener. Some qualities vary depending on the situation you are in. These tips are based for those in a casual situation, such as at a party.

You should always do your best to be a good listener. If someone knows you never really listen then they will be less likely to want to talk to you again.

Try not to ignore what is said and show your interest and your listening skills will come across. Knowing how to communicate better through listening skills will make you an overall better comunicator and someone people want to talk to.

Since the 1970's, learning how to communicate better has had a lot to do with understanding body language.

Julius Fast wrote a book entitled, Body Language in 1970. He talked about a new science called Kinesics. It opened the way to more studies and books on the subjects. Today, the term Body Language is very common and understood as an important element of communication.

In fact, experts in the field of communication suggest that there is a rule that says that 7% of the meaning of what a person is saying comes from their words.

Interestingly, 38% is based on the tone of their voice. 55% of the meaning comes from the body language of the person that is speaking. This rule comes from research that was published in the late 1960's.

Some now think that the percentages from this research might be slightly different. Nevertheless, the bottom line is still the same. If you don't know the basics of body language, you are missing a valuable tool for learning how to communicate better. We speak body language on a subliminal level, without actually realizing that we are communicating through body talk.

1. Face

The most expressive part of your body is your face. When you enter a room if you feel nervous, your expression might make you look aloof or unfriendly.

Smiling at the room is a sure-fire way to remove anyone's doubts about your approachability. Smiling makes us look warm, open and confident.

2. Eyes

They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. They certainly give people clues about what we are feeling.

A direct gaze towards someone can show interest- direct staring on the other hand can mean an intense dislike. Very little eye contact can show that you are shy.

3. Hands

Have you ever watched someone's hand gestures when they are talking? Open hand gestures tend to make a person appear open and honest. Bringing hands together to a point can accent the point you are making.

Wringing your hands or excessively moving your fingers and hands will give away nervousness. It can even make someone look dishonest- are they trying to hide something?

4. Posture

If you lean towards someone you are showing an interest in that person. If we are feeling low in confidence, we tend to slouch our shoulders and look down.

Men and women use different body language. For instance, women will stand close to each other, hold eye contact with the person they are talking to and use gestures.

Men make little effort to maintain eye contact and don't rely on the use of gestures to communicate. Men and women can learn how to communicate better by observing the differences in their use of body language.
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Peter Murphy has sinced written about articles on various topics from Modelling, Marketing and Web Development. Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at:. Peter Murphy's top article generates over 90500 views. Bookmark Peter Murphy to your Favourites.
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