When I was a young man my first job in sales was selling gym memberships. One of the trainers that worked at this gym was a great guy, funny, sociable, and well liked, but he had tremendous difficulty communicating with certain types of people. My favorite thing about him was that he was always himself. This character trait had the downside of putting him against a wall where he became ineffective in his job.

I could see there was a problem but at the time I didn't have the language to verbalize it to him. He was having a problem calibrating with those around him. Calibration is an aspect of rapport.

When we calibrate to our prospects, clients, friends, family, we are fine tuning ourselves to them through movement, tone, rhythm, cadence, etc. When I am working with someone who sighs a lot, I might begin to sigh and breathe a little deeper than I usually do. When I'm chatting with someone who fidgets, I might begin to get a little fidgety to match them.

This process also refers to the effect we have on others. When we're out of calibration, we can manifest problems in all facets of life. Checking in with ourselves and the states of those around us gives us a wealth of information without even speaking a word.

Calibration is energy work, pure and simple.

In a recent article I wrote about the exercise of 'trying on someone else's skin'. This explained how to 'become one' with your potential clients or love interests. The reaction I get all the time when I presuppose and visualize this is 'It feels like we've known each other forever.' It's incredibly powerful.

That level of calibration sometimes even allows people to bypass logic and say, 'Wow. It feels like we knew each other in a past life.' Now, I know not all of you subscribe to reincarnation, but think about how this instant level of intimacy/trust can further your persuasion abilities. If the person you're dealing with feels that comfortable with you, then they will most likely feel comfortable doing business with you as well.

I also posted an article which explained the process of surrounding yourself with a pink bubble. This is a different kind of calibration. It's most powerful in assisting a mutual level of energy. This pink bubble surrounds you and your prospect and merges the two levels. The outcome is similar and instant trust is nearly always accomplished.

And lastly, in case you missed it, since a lot of us work with groups of people, there is a group rapport building exercise called 'shovel it up, filter it out'. This is hot. I used this in Vegas at a recent seminar with amazing results and response. My energy, instead of being depleted at the end of the day (as is common for me when working with such large groups, was supercharged. (That is, until the end of the third day when I finally sat down and thought, 'Oops. I shouldn't have stopped. It's going to be hard to get back up.')

If you missed these articles, go back and check them out. They will really help you internalize the importance of this process and create instant rapport.