Sit by me silently and brush my beard   No mess to mop up from the bed today   Will we sit next door and watch the soaps?   We?ve nothing to do and we?ve nothing to say   Oh, when you go      Recently, we?ve been somewhat volatile   And last night it starts with that Joan Osbourne song   I hate it anyway but you made it worse   I know why you laughed and you should know you were wrong   Oh, when you go      Bird number one taught me I shouldn?t trust   That?s why I find unfounded doubts abound   But number two proved that with none, we?ve nothing   And now I?m only happy when you?re not around   Oh, when you go