I got me a job on the local paper    Everybody there thinks I'm nice    But they'd better look twice    `Cos it isn't me    I wanna be    Headline hustler    Scandal maker    Headline hustler    Money taker    You keep writing me letters    But I haven't got time    I'm busy looking at photographs    But they'd better not be from the BBC    You're gonna hear from me    Headline hustler    Scandal maker    Headline hustler    Money taker    Better not turn around    I'll stab you in the back    And you don't know what I'm hiding    Under my plastic mac, under my plastic mac    I got a very good friend in the CIA    And he says that he never takes bribes    But he's telling lies    `Cos he's into me    He knows I wanna be    Headline hustler    Scandal maker    Headline hustler    Money taker    If your brother's wearing dresses    And your neighbour's swapped his wife    Well, I'm gonna make the headlines    With your private life    With your other wife    Headline hustler    Scandal maker    Headline hustler    Money taker    Headline hustler    Scandal maker    Headline hustler    Money taker