my foundation was rocked my tried and true way to deal was to vanish   my departures were old I stood in the room shaking in my boots   at that particular time love had challenged me to stay   at that particular moment I knew not run away again   that particular month I was ready to investigate with you   at that particular time      we thought a break would be good for four months we sat and vacillated   we thought a small time apart would clear up the doubts that were abounding   at that particular time love encouraged me to wait   at that particular moment it helped me to be patient   that particular month we needed time to marinate in what "us" meant   at that particular time      I've always wanted for you what you've wanted for yourself   and yet I wanted to save us high water or hell   and I kept on ignoring the ambivalence you felt   and in the meantime I lost myself   in the meantime I lost myself   I'm sorry I lost myself?i am      you knew you needed more time time spent alone with no distraction   you felt you needed to fly solo and high to define what you wanted   at that particular time love encouraged me to leave   at that particular moment I knew staying with you meant deserting me   that particular month was harder than you'd believe but I still left   at that particular time