Today was the very first day that I felt alone that I felt it slipping away   Today was the very first time I toyed with the idea of throwing it all away   Today I felt a scorching flame, kneel down and obey misery   My ego was thrown in my face   This is the first row in hell      I can not feel, not see the pain   Why can´t it stop? What´s going on?   Today I was told that I was weak   My only goal was to stay far away from pain   Why can´t it stop? What´s going on?   All is lost now