When you start your journey, you go and meet your driver  You shake his hand, and hope he's feeling well  The things to come may be somewhat unfamiliar  Like eating herring where the sun does not go down  Our driver calculates what time we'll hit town    And every time a border comes  We go inside and meet with someone  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in  Then we can go and restart up the engines    Plumbing often varies in the various different countries  I like to crouch down and turn on those bidets  I'll have a cocktail, pick at my fingernails  And then I'll squat down for a wash to end the day  Our driver recommends we try the souffle    And every time a border comes  We go inside and meet with someone  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in  Then we can go and restart up the engines    Then we went down under, and we were told of farmers  Who brought some pigs here from the old country  But pigs eat turtle eggs and turtles eat jellyfish  And now you get stung if you're swimming in the sea  Our driver gestures out behind the palm trees    And every time a border comes  We go inside and meet with someone  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in  Then we can go and restart up the engines