I am a man of denial   Digging treasures so defiled   Will the violence take its toll?    Will obsession take my soul?       Feeling like an unborn creep   Masturbating in my sleep   Seeking out external host   The parasite that is my ghost      Praying for the ones I hurt   Dig my bed, sleep in the dirt   Chopping ground I've lost my way   Trading words for what I say      Now I look at what I've dug   See my harvest, only mud   In my storms of long-held rage   Clawing the walls of my cage      Sun is down and I can't sleep   Suicide is just a dream   See my dreams fell in the hole   Such a long, long time ago      Fever builds up in my brain   Dried and burning in the rain   Taking back all I have said   I won't rest 'til I am dead