Well they’re low cholesterol and high protein    hotter than a Mexican jumping bean    Have em dry roasted or vacuum packed    my peanuts come alive when you open that sack    Smoother than jiff, and fresher than planters    my peanuts exceed all standards    Def enough to knock you to your knees    and even planters don’t crack no nuts like these    My peanuts!       Well they rock they top they hit the spot    open a can and gobble em up    They’re ready for action, the girls do snatch em    sure to give you some satisfaction    So let’s not squibble they sure ain’t little    Deffer than any ole peanut brittle    An if you wanna chill no need to get ill    my peanuts give you a thrill    Like mickey dees my peanuts an me    were tasty eating from sea to sea    My peanuts!       My nuts stand tall they never fall    Ripe and yes always on the ball    FDA fresh and they are the best    A winner of every damn taste test    Eat em for pleasure or at your leisure    a taste that all the girls do treasure    Never illin but chillin    Never stealin but dealin    my peanuts are what you’re feelin    I take em to the beach, I take em to the park    I takem to your mothers house after dark    They ain’t like no nuts from Jimmy Carter    I know my nuts rock you harder    My peanuts!       I met a home girl from around the way    she saw my peanuts and wanted to play    She said can I hold your peanuts inside my hand    I said be careful cause they’re in demand    I took my peanuts outta the sack    her hand started movin up, down and back    She squeezed too hard, I said oh brother    it looks like you made peanut butter    Next time I jam her    I think I am a gonna talk a little bout my banana    Banana and nuts, banana and nuts    I’m gonna give you some banana an nuts    Banana an nuts banana an nuts    I think you need my banana an nuts       Always classy, never trashy, always flashy, never rashy, always tasty, never hasty, always racy, never pasty    You know nothin will come between us, unless of course it is-    (What is it?)    My peanuts!       This girl was yellin my head was swellin    What she was sayin there ain’t no tellin    I needed something to quiet her down    and my peanuts was all I found    I baked em I shaked em and then she taked em    Soon all was quiet in the house    because my peanuts were in her mouth    Like M&M’s you understand    they melt in your mouth and not in your hand    My peanuts have the fame my peanuts have the glory    my peanuts will invade your territory    My peanuts!       I’ll tell ya a little story bout a man named mel    Keep his peanuts inside the shell    Then one day he got hungry for some food    He ate his own peanuts now ain’t that rude?    (Dry roasted, vacuum packed, on a half shell, don’t tell Granny)    A girl who looked much better than bad    took my peanuts from inside my bag    Tasted them and then said I had salt peanuts, salt peanuts    My peanuts always rise to any occasion    My peanuts can handle any social situation       I met a home girl from Albuquerque    who ate my peanuts with her turkey    I know this song is kinda long    I guess I have ta go and I’ll be gone    Bust this beat just one more time    cause I think I have just one more rhyme       Have my peanuts and a diet coke    My peanuts and a little joke    My peanuts and some hog jowls    My peanuts and some candied yams