He's got a gun and great big man-tits   He's got jug-ears and tiny trunks   Dame Judi Dench is FURIOUS with him!   He's gone completely out to lunch      The Quantum of Solace! (The Quantum of Solace!)   I don't know what that means! (What does it mean?)      He's having flash-backs in black and white   No more waxed eyebrows, no more quips   He's got the stunting from the Bourne films   and lots of product sponsorship      The Suantum of Quolace! (The Suantum of Quolace!)   Did I get it confused? (I got it mixed-up!)      He's nearly dead-- no, really, nearly   It's much more gritty than before   No silly gadgets, just lots more fighting   with that French bloke that does parkour      The Thingy of Whatsit! (The Something of Boris!)   I forgot what it's called! (Is that what it was?)      Sometimes I wish Roger Moore would come back   with an underwater car or some kind of jetpack   or a hover-gondola and a Union Jack      Forget it, mate, it's not the '80s!   He'd rather kick you in the face!   We've got a new Bond for the noughties   because the world's a TERRIBLE place!      The Quantum of Solace! (The Quantum of Solace!)   I've written it down! (I'll remember it now!)