We never appreciate what we have until we lose it. There may be a number of things about your woman that you find annoying that make you imagine how great life could be without these irritations. Often, we fall into knee-jerk patterns where the slightest thing touches off a fight over the usual grievances.

At some point we decide that enough is enough, it's time to separate. It's only after knowing what life is really like without her that we know a mistake was made. If you've recently broken up with your ex, it's important that you make an assessment of your relationship. Use the following points as a guide for your reflection.

1.) Do you have serious doubts about getting back together with your ex? If so, some careful thought about why you wish to continue your relationship is needed. Remember the reasons for the break up in the first place. Will they happen again? If so, what will you do differently? Remember, changing your behavior is very difficult.

It's pointless to continue if the same old problems never get resolved. Fear of being single, of loneliness, or of the unknown are poor reasons to continue a bad relationship. If a better relationship is just around the corner, there's no need to get stuck in a poor one. If your present circumstances are really bad, then any change will most likely be for the better.

2.) Be honest with yourself and admit to your shortcomings and actions. No matter what you did, anger makes you rationalize and justify your behavior. It will always shift the blame away from yourself. The necessary changes cannot be made until you break free of this trap.

Taking responsibility is a sign of maturity and strength. Women are attracted by this. You should never force her to accept blame for her transgressions. There's no surer way to stir up more conflict. This sort of coercion doesn't work with an adult. This is how you would treat a child, not your ex.

3.) If you want your reconciliation to last, then the improvements and changes that you've made must be permanent. Reverting back to your old ways will only cause the relationship to revert back to it's usual problems and conflicts. So don't let old habits sabotage your efforts.

Taking some time to cool off and to think is vital to deciding what to do next. What you choose to do after a breakup with your girl will have a profound impact on your future relationship. Take your time, Use your head, and then choose your next course of action.