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Just A Boring Square
Peter Harris
Relationships go through many phases and some of these phases are a more pleasant experience than others. My experience has been that the initial phases of a relationship are the most exciting and interesting. I believe this is simply because everything is so new to the both of you. You are learning about each other and discovering something new each day. The familiarity hasn't set in yet and seeing each other is still exciting.
But what happens as the relationship develops and time passes? What was once new and exciting becomes older and more familiar. Spontaneity fades and routine becomes more pronounced. You may begin to notice that your partner is acting differently towards you. This may be subtle at first but then gradually becomes more apparent. The relationship doesn't seem as exciting as it was during the initial phases. What signs can you look for when the excitement is fading?
There are three things to look for that may be an indication that your partner is losing his or her enthusiasm with the relationship:
1. Doesn't respond to your wishes or requests. Sometimes the changes are very subtle and may go unnoticed. In the initial phases of the relationship your partner was likely to be very willing to accommodate you in many different ways. Now you begin to notice that they are not as quick to oblige you or it takes greater effort on your part to get them to respond to you.
2. Avoids committing to plans or postpones plans. Your partner becomes very noncommittal to ideas that you have or plans that you are making for the two of you. This could be something superficial like attending a dinner party to something more substantial like progressing the relationship to the next level. Your partner either won't give a firm answer to your question or finds excuses to delay whatever plan you have in mind.
3. Forgets dates of special occasions. Remember in the beginning of the relationship when your partner remembered every little date from the moment of your first kiss to what you had for dinner on your first date? As the excitement fades in a relationship you may notice that these memories are not as readily available to your partner as they once used to be. Your partner may even become annoyed when you are reminiscing about special occasions or dates.
These are just three areas to watch for when you suspect that the excitement is fading from your relationship. It seems to happen suddenly but usually it occurs as a gradual progression over time. It appears sudden because many of us don't recognize the signs until they are blatant and right in our face, or we have chosen not to recognize them in hopes that things will improve on their own. If you can identify the signs that the excitement is fading then you can likely do something about it.
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