If arguing and fighting is common between you and your mate, taking a close look at what you are arguing about may give you some clues. If you are just sniping at each other, it's usually a sign that you are unhappy with each other and not what set you off at the moment.

When a mate is jealous of you, they may show it by picking on you all the time. Your mate may not feel comfortable in addressing the real issue and show discomfort in other ways.

You need to sit down together and talk about what is really bothering both of you. Start by discussing the top two concerns you both have concerning the relationship. You both need to allow the other to speak without interruption or arguing. Listen to each others concerns without making comments and do not allow your mind to get distracted by what you are going to say, Listen without distractions. When you have both had the opportunity to speak, see if you can find ways to resolve the issues. Don't try to prove the other person wrong or prove you are right, but focus on finding ways to get beyond the issues.

Don't ignore general "picking on" as a minor issue. Over time, if not addressed, this sniping can escalate into an issue that can destroy the relationship. Discover the "real issues" to the problems.

Never argue about something someone outside the relationship has told you about your mate. If a friend or someone you know feels compelled to tell you something about your mate, assuming it's a valid statement by someone you trust, approach your mate with caution. You must give them a chance to explain or tell their side. Never let your mate think you believe the other source over them. But make it known how embarrassed and hurt you are by hearing such information from someone else and not from them.

Be very careful with this. Anything that's meant for you to know, you will eventually find out with no one else's help. But if the information is going to distract you and cause you to loose trust in your mate, then discussing it may be the best solution.

Having arguments isn't always a bad thing. Letting an argument escalate into a shouting match or something physical is. If you and your mate are arguing all the time and you want it to stop, you may benefit from visiting www.anitaburnett.com/winbacklove.htm.

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