When you think about yourself going on the journey to learn to start really getting good with women, what do you think it will be like? Hundreds and hundreds of women, a phone book full of numbers and a constant supply of sex? Finding the 'one' and getting married with kids? Do you see yourself living a successful life after dealing with problems in this area of life?
Next question: How much do you really believe that this is going to happen?
I have trouble imagining the future. Most of my life is lived day by day, minute by minute, with no plans whatsoever. I have some plans for the future, but these are hazy and none are solid. I might be going to med school. I might be doing my masters in psychology. I might be moving into a new house with a bunch of friends. This is the person I am at the moment.
When I think about what it would be like for myself after I have 'made it' and become massively successful with women, I think of myself sitting on the balcony in my apartment overlooking the sea, at an undetermined city as of yet, drinking my favorite drink and having my beautiful girlfriend come up behind me and start massaging me, asking if I want steak for breakfast. Hell yes I do bitch.
I think of how my business will be thriving and how that now my income is secure that I can spend time enjoying the things I like doing. I think about how wonderful it is that my girlfriend lets me loose on the streets to pick up more women so that we can both enjoy them. I think about how funny it is that I used to sit in my bed at 4 am after a night out writing about what my current sticking points are and what I could do to make it better, because that's so far out of my reality that it seems like it's a scene from someone else's life.
How much do I believe this is going to be a reality? Honestly, it's hard for me to really believe that will be me some day. I want to believe in it 100% but it's an issues that I will need to deal with. What is the effect of this?
100% belief in the fact that you will be that man later in life will help you become that person. Having a vision helps you see the light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. However, the reality is that this is something that is far in the future. It is a dream that isn't 100% realized yet (if your dream has been realized, congratulations. I envy you). How do you turn your dreams into reality?
Firstly, realize that it will take time for your dreams to be realized. The deep centered personality change that you're aiming for is something that will take a while. To cultivate a truly attractive personality takes time and effort. It takes experience and understanding to strip away the barriers that were limiting you from fully expressing yourself.
We live in a society that wants to have everything instantly. Fast internet, fast cars, fast profit, fast food. People want magic pills and instant results from everything. In this area of self improvement and becoming better with women, everyone wants a quick fix, an article that explains their problem, a few lines that they need to memorize to get the woman of their dreams. Anyone who sells a product that says, "This product will give you information that you will have to practice over and over to internalize it. This will take between a few months and a few years but you will be better in the end," will probably not sell.
Learn to be patient.
After that, start to develop your skills bit by bit. Start approaching women, by just saying, "Hi, my name is ____". Just learn to do that. It doesn't matter if you're getting numbers or lays. You're learning the basic skills. Eventually, women will start opening up to you after you talk to them. Then learn to take the interaction further. Have 5 minute conversations. Then 10 minute conversations. Then learn how to take numbers. Step by step.
If you focus on the small things in your skill set, and have your larger goal in mind, you will get to the goal. Guaranteed. It has been shown over and over again that ALL types of guys can learn to do this. You are no exception.
