Rubber Band    There's a rubber band that plays tunes out of tune    In the library garden Sunday afternoon    While a little chappie waves a golden wand       Rubber Band    In 1910 I was so handsome and so strong    My moustache was stiffly waxed and one foot long    And I loved a girl while you played teatime tunes       Dear Rubber Band, you're playing my tune out of tune, oh       Rubber Band    Won't you play a haunting theme again to me    While I eat my scones and drink my cup of tea    The sun is warm but it's a lonely afternoon       Oh, play that theme       Rubber Band    How I wish that I could join your Rubber Band    We could play in lively parks throughout the land    And one Sunday afternoon, I'd find my love       Rubber Band,    In the '14-'18 war I went to sea    Thought my Sunday love was waiting home for me    And now she's married to the leader of the band, oh       (spoken)    Oh sob... I hope you break your baton