I am Jan Brady,    and you must believe that    or forever perish in your doubt    I am the soul embodiment of Jan,    and I exist to serve the Brady alter    for I have become one with another soul,    and I have no need for others!       * Chorus*       Jan Brady has returned    took over my soul and body    then the hairstyle flew up all by itself    never to be changed    I am Jan, Jan I am    I like to eat green eggs and ham       so now you must believe and worship me    or else a lost soul you will be    I pick up my lunch from Alice our house keeper    I go to school with my Brady brothers    we live in the same house    but we come from different mothers!       *Chorus*       I know I cracked the family picture with my bike    I was'nt wearing my glasses    but I fixed everything with a bat of my eye lashes    with my wig, I'll be a smash    polyester plaid bell bottoms,    I ain't no TRASH!!!!       *Chorus*