I've found a new beauty secret for my Rod   It feels so good when I rub it all over ..Todd!   So soft and silky with the most beautiful sheen   It came in a box labeled,       Not Penis Cream!   Not Penis Cream!      Saw it on TV and I ordered on the phone   Three to five days rush delivered to my home   Then in my mailman's eye I saw a knowing glean   He handed me a box labeled,      Not Penis Cream!   Not Penis Cream!      It could be almost anything   Cds or girly magazines   A baseball glove or a year's supply of Spam   But one thing's for sure, yeah yeah      It's Not Penis Cream!   Not Penis Cream!   It's Not Penis Cream!   Not Penis Cream!