I really couldn't shut my brain off today. I just couldn't stop thinking.

"What drove me to work online?"

How did I come to the decision that I was going to do this?

What drove me from earning over $6k a month as a personal trainer, a single father with a 1 year old son, to deciding that I was going to be successful in this world of 1s and 0s (that's internet speak for you non-nerds)?

What is my motivation for working online.....it must have been insanity.

Absolutely.

Actually, I realized I was exhausted.

I hadn't had a good night's sleep that I could remember in the longest while.

I got sick of the 5am training sessions that, although enjoyable due to my very select clientele ( fortunately I loved the people I trained like family), drained me of the little energy I did have to better MYSELF!

I couldn't train in the sport that I loved and wanted to pursue because it was either time or money.

They seemed to elude each other.

I slept in my car between sessions.

I had no choice but to spend more time at the gym than home due to my stretched out schedule.

People called me a gym rat and it stung, because I felt like a slave.

The few days of the week I got to see my son were secretly miserable. I adored being around him and chasing him allover the house, but the fact that he had already taken his first steps without me, cried for his mother when he was cranky, and would refuse to sleep in my arms broke my heart.

Enough was enough.

I decided to inform my clientele that I was done with Personal Training; that I had a month left and that was it.

Whatever happened was going to happen. But I was going to see my son grow up whether I made a fortune online, or worked at McDonald's.

I didn't care.

People told me I was nuts, and I could see how badly they expected me to fail, but that's the nature of a human being.

I expected that.

Fortunately, I've always had belief in myself when nobody else would, so I kept on keeping on.

Since I was a young, chubby, adolescent, I realized that taking the bullies' remarks to heart never helps, it just makes you want more pie.

I did listen to the very few individuals that told me to keep going. To, "See what happens." One of those friends is an individual that started off selling hosting from his apartment, and turned it into a million dollar a year business. His black card was all the proof I needed that this was possible.

Obviously, I had less energy for that first month.

Yeah, it was hard.

And yes, I saw my son even less frequently.

After that first day and making a sale, I realized how real this was.

I got past the biggest obstacle of any real business online.

My way of thinking.

Making money was now a tangible thing. I had something I could spend.

It wasn't just a dream any longer,and I was doing what I had set out to do.

In the end, it's two years later and I'm making a couple years worth of salary spending half the energy.

I still work as long, but it's because I love it, and because my son likes playing on the, "'puda," as he says.

So, what is my motivation for working online?

My motivation for working online is myself, and yours should be yourself.

Nothing external caused me to make the decision that I was fed up.

Nothing had changed. Everything external was as redundant as it had always been.

What changed were my self beliefs.

I remembered how many people, authority figures, in my formative years had doubted me, and I would prove them wrong.

I was the designer of my own destiny, and I'd win or lose on my terms.

Although, I proved the naysayers incorrect on their terms as well.

I recommend a book called "The New Psycho-Cybernetics." You can get it at any bookstore.

It also comes in a CD set if you'd rather listen.

I've read every book out there, and this is the definitive manual for using the full potential of your mind. It's not really New-Age either, it's been around since the 60s ( I think it may be older), so I don't think it qualifies. I promise you that you'll thank me for this.

If you don't get it, take what you will from my example, and always believe in your own abilities, especially when no one else does.

You're the only thing you know about for sure anyway.

So, until next time, keep the pie off your face.