Online dating is now becoming a big thing in singles dating since it is so easy to meet people online which can lead to something special with the right two people. There is a catch though; sometimes the results of online dating are not so positive once someone moves from the online dating world to real life.



Guy meets girl for the first time.

Let’s suppose that a guy feels that he has found a girl whose profile fits his dating criteria and decides to make contact with her and they start communicating with each other on a regular basis. After exchanging many messages and phone conversations their relationship blossoms. He now feels that he knows her so well that the online relationship can be taken a step further and he decides to set up a real date so that he can meet her in person and get to know her a little better.

Finally, they arrange to meet in person over lunch but it turns out to be a complete disaster. The girl does not seem to be the same person he had such online chemistry with and the sparkling conversations they had online were now reduced to strained politeness.

The date eventually came to an end with the girl telling him she had had a nice time but he did not feel the same about her any more after meeting her in person. There just wasn’t the spark he had expected for some reason.

This is a common scenario in online dating when meeting someone for the first time after building up an online relationship. Things can be far different in real life and some people just don’t click in person.

So, why don’t some real world dates work out?

How can someone be so different in real life when they seemed so interesting and likeable when online? Were you being deliberately deceived by the other person or did you simply read the whole situation wrong?

The problem is that communicating with someone online is very different from a face to face meeting. Deception is so much easier when communication is by a series of text messages where misleading answers can so easily made up. Even a poor liar can be convincing when there is no awkward body language to give away the tell-tale signs of deceit.

People might not deliberately lie to you but they tend to show only their good side online as it is human nature to be liked and wanted. Showing their negative side would be the kiss of death for any future relationship.

However, once this online buffer zone is removed from the relationship any person behind the computer screen is left without their safety net and their true personality usually comes to the fore whether it is good or bad.

How to get out of the online relationship

Once you realize that the online relationship will not develop into a real one then it is time to exit gracefully without causing hurt or offence to the other person. Of course it will be embarrassing and it will require a degree of tact to avoid hurt feelings but there is no point in leaving them with the idea that things could work out between you if you know in your heart that they won’t.

Obviously, telling them in person that you see no future in the relationship will be more difficult than doing this when you are back online.

Rejection should be done in such a way that the other person will not be hurt. Don’t make up feeble excuses about why you no longer wish to continue a relationship with them. They will see through them so simply tell them that you feel that there is something missing from the relationship and that it would be a mistake for both of you to continue it. Tell them it is not just their fault alone and allow them to give their opinion and ask questions if they want.

With luck, you may find that they feel the same and you can both exit the relationship on good terms and without bitterness. Both of you can then move on a little wiser from the experience which is a good thing.