Donald Trump didn't get where he is today without confidence. He's unapologetic and straight forward. He knows what he wants and he knows what he doesn't. And whether you love or loath "The Donald," you have to respect the clarity that he operates from as a leader; and make no mistake, he absolutely oozes confidence.



Trump's confidence is a by-product of his relentless pursuit of his goals. He's not here to further anyone else's agenda-he puts Trump first. It is exactly this personality trait that causes some people to think of Trump as an arrogant, self-centered jerk, while other's see him as a powerful, confident leader. So which side do you come down on?

The "Trump Test" (patent pending:-)

You can tell a lot about a person by their opinion of Trump. In a nutshell, people with lower confidence tend to see "Trump the jerk," and people with higher confidence tend to see "Trump the powerful leader. It's a very simple gauge to be sure, but the "Trump test" has proven accurate about 90% of the time in my experience.

And it's not just Trump. People with lower confidence have a tendency to see all confident people as "jerks" to some degree. Sadly, this state of mind does not produce confidence in their own life. In fact, it's as simple as this: "you will never be confident as long as you have a low opinion of people who are confident."

Let me repeat that last statement just to drive the point home: "you will never be confident as long as you have a low opinion of people who are confident."

Think about this question: what is your opinion of Trump, or more importantly, of all confident people? Do you secretly feel that they're "arrogant" or "self-centered?" Dig deep-really think about it.

If you discover a personal bias against confident people lurking somewhere in your psyche, you have found the root of your confidence issues. And believe it or not, that's great news-because once you have isolated the source of the problem, you are well on your way to solving it. Maybe you've heard the old saying, "you can't hit a target you can't see."

So there are two important truths to keep in mind here:

1. How you feel about others determines how you feel about yourself

2. Changing your opinion of other people automatically changes your opinion of yourself

Here's a simple exercise to begin changing your opinion of confident people (and yourself). Think of someone you consider an arrogant, selfish jerk. It could be Trump or it could be your uncle Joe-it really doesn't matter. Now, right now, as you read this, change your opinion of this person. In fact, see this person as a good and confident person with healthy self-esteem.

Keep faking it until you make it!

Are you having trouble with this exercise? Does it feel unnatural to see this person differently? If so, there are several ways of making the whole process easier and more effective.

A simple NLP-influenced trick is to begin associating this person with something you already love (expensive Norwegian chocolate works for me). You are in fact, "tying" these two things together mentally when you begin talking about them in the same sentence or seeing them in the same setting. You create a strong association between the two, so that the feelings you have for one of them (in my case, great chocolate, begins to "infect" the other. The more real you can make this connection, by visualizing it for example, the more effective it will be.

Also, don't forget the importance of asking the right questions. Ask yourself, "what is great about this person?" As you begin seeking out the good qualities, you will certainly find them, and your opinion of this person, and all confident people will begin to change.

Feeling better about confident people will cause you to feel better about being confident. In effect, you will begin 'giving yourself permission" to express the confident person that is already inside you, waiting to break free.

Insecurity comes from the deepest levels of our minds-and so does confidence. Feeling positive emotions about confident people is the easiest way of boosting your confidence from the inside out.

"Whatever we appreciate, we imitate."