Let's say that you have a relationship for some



time and you really love your partner. Although,

you have been caught having an affair by your

girlfriend. No matter how she caught you, she saw

the messages from your mobile, she heard you

talking with the other or saw you together, you

have to deal the situation if you really want to

save your relationship.

Infidelity causes intense emotional pain, anger,

disbelief, fear, guilt, shame; but an affair

doesn't have to mean the end of your

relationship.

Here are some useful tips that may help you save

your relationship:

- end the affair - first of all you must end your

affair; if you choose to stay with your

girlfriend, you must end all interactions and

communications with the other

- be honest- open communication with your partner

it is very important; if she caught you in the

act and she know now that you have been

unfaithful to her, you have told her already many

lies, so now you must confess; don't deny,

because this will make things worst;

- apologize her - even if you like it with the

other, show your girlfriend that you are sorry

for the pain you caused her and promise her that

you finished your affair; convince her that you

really love her and you don't wanna lose her for

a mistake

- talk to her - if she wants to know all the

details, you've better tell her even if she will

be hurt, and let her vent her hurt and anger; she

will tell how she feels more than once but you

should understand her and listen; remember that

it is your fault that she feels like that

- identify the issues - identify often points to

underlying problems in your relationship; examine

your relationship to understand what has

contributed to the affair;some people cheat

because they aren't getting their needs met

inside their relationship; if she ask you why you

did it, don't be brutal; say it the truth but in

a diplomatic way

- be accountable - if you had an affair you must

take responsibility for your actions

- give her some space - you both need a break

from the emotional stress; you'd better discuss

after she's calm down

- rebuilt trust - start with small opportunities

to grow closer together; after infidelity,

communication becomes incredibly strained; but if

you don't communicate you can never heal and

build trust again in your relationship

- determine your shared goal - make sure that you

both want to save your relationship

- go to a relationship counselor - to help you

dealing with your relationship problems; it might

really help you to save your relationship

- set groundrules - decide both some rules for

the future in you relationship so that both feel

safe and secure

Sometimes after passing trow a situation like

this, the relationships becomes stronger than

ever before. But, if it happens that your

girlfriend doesn't want to forgive you for what

you did, and want to end the relationship, you've

better respect her decision.