The reason is that we don't understand fully the concept of contracts. Contracts are those agreements that we made with other souls prior to incarnating, agreements to assist each other in personal, spiritual and emotional growth while on the ?Planet of Free Will?. Without this understanding, it's easy to fall into the trap of not taking responsibility for what we have created (everything in our reality) and blaming others for causing the chaos in our lives.



There are several categories of contracts. First are the Soul Contracts. These are the agreements to assist each other in mastering our primary life lessons. It must take a great deal of love for an individual soul to agree to do things like abandoning us so that we can learn to heal from the fear of separation. Or how about refusing to love us for who we are so that we remember who that is and stand in our own power. Why this becomes so confusing for us mortals is that Soul Contracts are choices that we made before we came into these bodies, and the memories of them are hidden while we are here.

Once we fulfill our contract, everything else in a relationship is up to our conscious choice. We are free to operate in relationship with that soul to the extent we choose, or move on. If we look at a soul contract to teach another about love, for example, that may have meant that we were supposed to be in relationship with that person only long enough for them to ?get? the lesson of unconditional love. Too often, however, that lesson leads to marriage and staying in a relationship past the time the lesson was learned because of a social code which dictates that to be the acceptable thing to do.

Recently, a client came to me whose mother had abandoned her at the hospital at birth. She had spent her entire life hating her, because she didn't understand that the contract between the two of them was to bring her soul in ? NOTHING MORE! Once she was able to see this, she was able to forgive her birth mother for the first time, and subsequently she was able to get on with her life. Another category of contract is the Alternate Plan.

Suppose that you chose Mary to be your mother so that you could learn the life lesson of Trust, and you chose Sam to be your father so that you could learn to master communication. What if Sam was killed in a war before the two of them could meet. You would have to find another biological father with the same issues around communication or forgo the incarnation. There are a lot of ?Plan B? contracts in our lives due to situations just like this. A third type of contract is the Serendipity contract. These are additional lessons we want to master in an incarnation. They are like elective courses we can take while we are here, and we enlist loving souls to engage with us if we happen to ?bump? onto them along the way. An example of this is that I might have contracted with Janet to teach me emotional communication if I happened to run into her. Then when my marriage failed, I could be led to her to be my therapist. If I never encountered her, I might find another soul buddy to help me with the same lesson, or I might skip that lesson totally because the ?set ups? that would have precipitated the need for it never occurred.

There are no accidents. Everything does indeed happen for a reason, just not necessarily for the one we might have thought. Once the concept of contracts is understood, it then becomes easy to break free from the illusion of victim mentality. There are no victims. We alternate roles in this game all the time. One minute we are feeling persecuted and look around for a rescuer. Next we are abusing our power with another who then thinks we are victimizing them. It's a vicious circle that takes us out of living in the present moment and into a cycle of fear and control.

From this space, it is impossible to create the reality we desire, because we are not operating from our place of personal power ? we've given our power away to someone or something outside of ourselves. The solution then is to surrender to our higher self in gratitude and bless the person who lovingly contracted with us to assist us to heal a part of our self. Then and only then can we live in the reality we desire and deserve!