As the kids start growing up it is up to the parents to start bringing the kids into social fabric of the society. The learning's go up to the age of 15 or 16 but by that age the kids have usually developed their own understanding of the social fabric and know how to deal with it. However some kids may need your intervention even at that age.
When you kid is young say between zero to 2 years you should not force them to integrate well with the social settings. At this age the kids are able to barely speak and they cannot express their feelings. Some kids you will see will be happy seeing the other kids and some kids are absolutely own their own. It is natural as that age kids are very immature and don't understand friendships. At that stage your best bet is to at least take them out to a playground or a learning school to make sure that they are getting familiar with a few faces.
As the kids grow you need to tell them how to express their feelings. Anyone older than two years will understand some expressions like "hello", "thank you and "how are you". If you teach your kid these things then at least they will have a way to start the conversation. The scene changes drastically when the kids enter the preschool and they start forming friendships of their won without any help from you. At the school make sure that teachers involve kids in variety of projects which will help them get into habit of talking to other fellow students.
School and teachers play a big part as they are able to use that setting where parents are not there to help as an advantage to get the kid out of shell and protective environment.
Later on in life there will be various places where the kids may need your help but largely they will be able to do on their own. The initial hesitation is all gone because of the social fabric training in the initial years. As always there will be kids who will still be left out. It is based on the kid's nature and the family influences. Some kids will need more support throughout and some will never.
So it is really up to the parents to develop their child into a good social being and it will surely lay a good foundation for future years.
How To Develop Social Skills
We should start developing social skills when we are young children. This is the best way to guarantee the skills will be inculcated in us. It begins at home and should be observed and practiced there. Parents have a social duty to take the lead in training their children to have social skills. This is because parents are the first people a child gets to socialize with.
Teaching social skills to your children gives them the confidence that they could stand up on their own two feet in the future. Therefore, parents must be equipped with knowing the proper way of developing social skills in their children.
The following are basic social skills that little children need.
1. Train your child to be polite. Being polite is not simply taught, it must be seen and practiced at home. Train the child to use the basic and important words in life.
- Thank you.
- I'm sorry.
- I forgive you.
- Excuse me.
These are the set of words that must be easily said when needed. It should be practiced daily at home. Being able to say thank you verbalizes your appreciation for the good gesture shown by another. However, children being children, they naturally show only what they feel. It is sometimes hard for them to say the words when they do not really appreciate something done for them. Have the patience to explain to them that they should always thank the other person, no matter what it was that was done for them.
Train them to say I am sorry. These may be the most difficult words to say but is healing for both the speaker and the receiver. It is part of building up the child to be normal, someone who could make mistakes and accepts corrections. Likewise, your child will also grow up to accept that people make mistakes.
We cannot protect our children from being hurt, but we could teach them the virtue of forgiving. This is a very important phase in their social development. In that way, I forgive you, could sincerely be said.
We often tell our to kids to say excuse me when they sneeze or are trying to reach for something between other people. You must painstakingly train your child to do so. It is part of developing their social skills.
2. Train them in table manners. You must be able to practice table manners at home so that your child will get used to it. Using the word please is basic and it should be practiced religiously. There is no need to enroll your child in a sophisticated school. As children grow up they get to join you in different social gatherings. There is nothing more rewarding than seeing your child practice what he learned from your home.
3. Always dress your children according to the occasion. Some parents tend to overdress their children to make them the center of attraction. This may have a negative effect on the child. It is still best to have the child dressed appropriately.
4. Communicate frequently with your child. Parent-child communication gives the child a feeling of importance. This communication serves as the basis for exchange of knowledge and bonding. This way, a child grows up communicating well with others.
5. Provide your child with the opportunity to play with other children in their social circle. Intervene only when needed.
Often times, pre-school teachers are left with the problem of teaching kids how to socialize with the other students. As a child enters the classroom, a seasoned teacher can easily detect someone who has been nurtured and trained with love at home. Developing social skills in your children is the best gift you could give your child in facing the real world.
Both Amit Kheterpal & Peter Murphy are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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