It's nice to have a set of guidelines detailing the substance you're expected to base your anniversary present on as each year of wedded bliss passes. But let's be honest; it doesn't exactly show off your wisdom, imagination or wit, does it? And who really wants tin or fruit off everyone, or indeed ivory off anyone? Let's get personal about proceedings!



There's someone in every family who has learnt the anniversary gift protocol down to the letter. No sooner have you mentioned that it's Ken and Mary's 27th than they have retorted with the word ?ketchup? without skipping a beat. You stare at the ground, wondering what on earth you could buy that both celebrates their partnership and satisfies these rigid rules ? and who on earth compiled this list of seemingly random materials in the first place ?

Yes, some of the items have a certain pragmatic grace or glamour to them. Paper, for all its low-budget connotations, can actually be the backbone of all manner of exciting gifts, from books, albums and cards to travel and entertainment tickets, pictures and humorous calendars. And as time goes by, the silver, gold, pearl, ruby and diamond gifts will certainly be appreciated. But the in-between years always seem a little arbitrary, like the guesses in some game of Animal, Vegetable, Mineral.

Except perhaps in the round-number years, this anniversary gift etiquette is not followed all that rigidly beyond a hardcore group of dedicated sticklers. Most of us are happy to give some flowers, a bottle of wine or something sweet. The trouble is, none of these gifts has ?anniversary? written all over it. They don't exactly celebrate the milestone of staving off divorce for yet another year, do they? But with a little research, you'll find a special gift that the couple will just love.

The trick is to get inside the minds of the couple and to find out what they have in common. They have presumably got something in common or they wouldn't have tied the knot in the first place (unless they have taken the theory that opposites attract to its ultimate conclusion, in which case you can buy them almost anything and at least one of them will find it attractive).

To get inside their minds, get inside their household. Any excuse will do: borrowing a drill; catching up on old times; cadging a cup of sugar (not recommended if you live more than 50 miles away). Once you're over the threshold, start to snoop. Take in the sights, sounds and smells that greet you and in the first few seconds you'll be able to tell if they are art or music lovers, boozers, travellers, house-proud types, collectors or simply people who don't take themselves too seriously. Soon your head will be full of present ideas, and then it's just a simple case of getting on the internet and matching your new-found knowledge with the bountiful selection of anniversary gifts on offer.

You can still opt to obey the traditional wedding anniversary gift protocols ? but by focusing on the couple rather than the material, you'll automatically put your imagination into gear and choose something really special.

For further information, please visit out website at http://www.gettingpersonal.co.uk