Hmmm. Should a hobby be productive? The dictionary tells me it's an activity engaged in primarily for pleasure, or a pastime. If we go with that definition, sudoku and solitaire count. But I'm of the mind that time is a gift. Every day is precious, and when I have leisure time for a hobby, I do want it to be meaningful. How can I get there from here?
The reasons people participate in a hobby are as varied as the activities themselves. You might think about your reasons. Do you just need to relax? Blow off steam? Is it a way for you to socialize? Do you have a need to compete, with yourself or others? A desire to create beauty? Lots of good motivations here for non-job pursuits. Figure out why you love to rock climb, do leather work, or be on stage. When you do, you may find some ways to make your hobby a truly meaningful part of your life.
If you love to work with your hands, consider the final destination of the wonderful items you create. If you make knick knacks, someone will have to dust them, so try to make sure there's an appreciative someone out there before you crank out twenty-five decorative wall plaques. If you make useful items, you'll perhaps find more willing recipients. I don't like to dust at all, but I do enjoy a quilt to snuggle up in, or a beautiful crock to put my kitchen spoons in.
You can give away your creations far beyond family and friends. Women's shelters, schools, and various charities would be thrilled to have you donate beautiful, useful items. Ask what their clients need...maybe it's something you love to make or grow! Community service groups are also always looking for ways to fund their work. You could donate a particularly successful item you've made to a silent auction or raffle-type fund raiser. Any Lions Club, volunteer fire department, school booster club, or youth group would be grateful.
Social, experiential hobbies such as community choirs or instrumental groups, amateur theatre, and sports teams, can lead to wonderful friendships, aside from the joy of participating in the creation of a huge piece of glorious sound or exciting entertainment. You're likely to meet people you'd never otherwise cross paths with. If you pay attention, you may very well find a shy person you can make feel more comfortable, or a beginner you can take under your wing, sharing your experience and knowledge. Sometimes young people gravitate to such groups, in hopes of finding acceptance that they can't find elsewhere. You can help make sure that they're welcomed and nurtured.
Consider also teaching your hobby to others. Start with your own kids, maybe. Boys' and girls' clubs, scout troops, church youth groups and 4-H clubs are always in need of generous adults to share what they know with young people. It's grand fun being the expert, and volunteers are usually shown much appreciation in these groups. Think about it some, and your hobby can truly enrich your life, and the lives of others.
Want To Be Perfect
Much of our behaviour is a result of how we are treated when we were young. Girls are more often taught the importance of compliance from a young age. Many are taught that the displeasure of others should be avoided at all costs. This means in later life that many women find being assertive contrary to their learned set of values.
It is important for women learn the importance and real value of their own feelings and opinions. The displeasure of others, especially of the dominant or bullying type is not the end of the world. Ignoring ones own needs can be much more damaging in the long term. Remember it is not your responsibility to make everyone else OK. You should treat others with the respect that you would like to be shown yourself, but ultimately if it is reasonable to say no or make a request, then if it leads to the displeasure of others it is their problem not yours.
Never be afraid to speak up for yourself.
Breathe deeply when confronted with aggression from others and stand firm
Don't let others control your emotions and use them against you.
Constantly remind yourself of the benefits of being assertive
What you will gain from learning assertiveness skills:
Gain self-respect and be respected by others.
Gain confidence and feel less anxious when facing conflict.
Be able to say no when you want to.
Be able to ask for what you want.
Be able to accept and give compliments and praise.
Have the courage to say difficult things
Taking the time to learn assertiveness skills can change your life. Living in a constant state of non-assertiveness can make you feel, angry, resentful, depressed and under confident. You may think you are improving your relationship by giving in and avoiding confrontation, but you may be surprised how your relationships improve when you demand the respect that you deserve. It will be difficult at first, especially in long standing relationships where your change in behaviour may spark resistance and anger in others, however it is their anger not yours, the most important thing to remember is that their anger need not hurt you (you can learn to control your emotions and the effect they have on your thoughts and body), denying yourself a voice hurts much more, and their anger is usually short lived.
Both David Brooke & Silicon Beach Training are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
David Brooke has sinced written about articles on various topics from self improvement and motivation, Fitness and Health. David Brooke, aka "The Brooker" has been a coach, speaker, and motivator for over 25 years, specializing in coaching people to be more productive and apply the "attitude of gratitude" in their lives. To access his "20 Point Survival Toolkit", a set of st. David Brooke's top article generates over 165000 views. Bookmark David Brooke to your Favourites.
Silicon Beach Training has sinced written about articles on various topics from . benefits of being assertive. Silicon Beach Training's top article generates over 2400 views. Bookmark Silicon Beach Training to your Favourites.
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