An impressive way of climbing in rank, as a welcome alternative to being nasty, is simply to be good at an activity: to be expert, knowledgeable, and skilled at a particular system. This earns the respect of the others, and it cements a child’s place in the group activity by being a valued, even indispensable, member of the group. It means that when competition becomes an issue—that is, when there are only a fixed number of places in the group or on the team a child will guarantee himself a place, and remain in the safety of the group.



If children lack social relations and friends, it can lead to depression and low self-esteem. Social support can provide a buffer against adverse life events and even decrease the risk of depression when there are no life events. So absence of social interactions in childhood, in itself, increases the risk of depression. Some researchers have even claimed that depressive disorders are always a direct reflection of social environment, both present and past. In general, adults who are exposed lack of social interaction in childhood have an increased likelihood of mental disorder. These facts prove the importance of positive social experience during childhood and a crucial role of friendship in children.

Applying sociological concepts into practice, it is possible to say that children are apt to establish certain behavior patterns of social interaction. In friendship, they establish social rank, but more often this is based on other qualities than simply acting tough. In new environment (summer camp or new school), the girls tend to wait at least a week before starting to assert dominance. For them, being nice initially, which helped build friendships, is an equally important priority. For example, a dominant girl would simply ignore a lower-status girl's suggestions or comments. She might even act as if the lower-status girl is not there, by not looking at her. Eye contact or social exclusion are powerful ways of exerting social control in friendship relations.

Sociologists admit that “having friends is more important to some children than to others". Vicarious, collective courtship by friends and peers might explain why-humans are so good at producing certain kinds of cooperative display. Evolutionary psychologists have usually assumed that human cooperation evolved for survival benefits. Cooperation can certainly help the cooperators survive better — if they are doing something that is actually useful together. “Friends are not just peers in general, but particular persons who share ideas, feelings, and interests. Two friends are alike and therefore different in similar ways from other peers who are not their friends".