By Karen Martin



What is writer's block?

Well, I just can't think of a single darn thing to

say. Oh well, I'm outta here!

Sound familiar? No! Oh, get real! We've all

experienced this phenomenon when we absolutely have to

write something, particularly on deadline. I'm talking

about. . . . .uh, I can't think of what the word is .

. . oh, yes, it's on the tip of my tongue . . . it's:

WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!

Whew! I feel better just getting that out of my head

and onto the page!

Writer's block is the patron demon of the blank page.

You may think you know EXACTLY what you're going to

write, but as soon as that evil white screen appears

before you, your mind suddenly goes completely blank.

I'm not talking about Zen meditation

stare-at-the-wall-until-enlightenment-hits kind of

blank.

I'm talking about sweat trickling down the back of

your neck, anguish and panic and suffering kind of

blank. The tighter the deadline, the worse the anguish

of writer's block gets.

Having said that, let me say it again. "The tighter

the deadline, the worse the anguish of writer's block

gets." Now, can you figure out what might possibly be

causing this horrible plunge into speechlessness?

The answer is obvious: FEAR! You are terrified of that

blank page. You are terrified you have absolutely

nothing of value to say. You are afraid of the fear of

writer's block itself!

It doesn't necessarily matter if you've done a decade

of research and all you have to do is string sentences

you can repeat in your sleep together into coherent

paragraphs. Writer's block can strike anyone at any

time. Based in fear, it raises our doubts about our

own self-worth, but it's sneaky. It's writer's block,

after all, so it doesn't just come and let you know

that. No, it makes you feel like an idiot who just had

your frontal lobes removed through your sinuses. If

you dared to put forth words into the greater world,

they would surely come out as gibberish!

Let's try and be rational with this irrational demon.

Let's make a list of what might possibly be beneath

this terrible and terrifying condition.

1. Perfectionism. You must absolutely produce a

masterpiece of literature straight off in the first

draft. Otherwise, you qualify as a complete failure.

2. Editing instead of composing. There's your

monkey-mind sitting on your shoulder, yelling as soon

as you type "I was born?," no, not that, that's wrong!

That's stupid! Correct correct correct correct?

3. Self-consciousness. How can you think, let alone

write, when all you can manage to do is pry the

fingers of writer's block away from your throat enough

so you can gasp in a few shallow breaths? You're not

focusing on what you're trying to write, your focusing

on those gnarly fingers around your windpipe.

4. Can't get started. It's always the first sentence

that's the hardest. As writers, we all know how

EXTREMELY important the first sentence is. It must be

brilliant! It must be unique! It must hook your

reader's from the start! There's no way we can get

into writing the piece until we get past this

impossible first sentence.

5. Shattered concentration. You're cat is sick. You

suspect your mate is cheating on you. Your electricity

might be turned off any second. You have a crush on

the local UPS deliveryman. You have a dinner party

planned for your in-laws. You . . . Need I say more.

How can you possibly concentrate with all this mental

clutter?

6. Procrastination. It's your favorite hobby. It's

your soul mate. It's the reason you've knitted 60

argyle sweaters or made 300 bookcases in your garage

workshop. It's the reason you never run out of Brie.

FACE IT ? IT'S ONE OF THE REASONS YOU HAVE WRITER'S

BLOCK!

How to Overcome Writer's Block

Okay. I can hear that herd of you running away from

this article as fast as you can. Absurd! you huff.

Never in a million years, you fume. Writer's block is

absolutely, undeniably, scientifically proven to be

impossible to overcome.

Oh, just get over it! Well, I guess it's not that

easy. So try to sit down for just a few minutes and

listen. All you have to do is listen ? you don't have

to actually write a single word.

Ah, there you all are again. I am beginning to make

you out now that the cloud of dust is settling.

I am here to tell you that WRITER'S BLOCK CAN BE

OVERCOME.

Please, remain seated.

There are ways to trick this nasty demon. Pick one,

pick several, and give them a try. Soon, before you

even have a chance for your heartbeat to accelerate,

guess what? You're writing.

Here are some tried and true methods of overcoming

writer's block:

1. Be prepared. The only thing to fear is fear itself.

(I know, that's a clich?but as soon as you start

writing, feel free to improve on it.) If you spend

some time mulling over your project before you

actually sit down to write, you may be able to

circumvent the worst of the crippling panic.

2. Forget perfectionism. No one ever writes a

masterpiece in the first draft. Don't put any

expectations on your writing at all! In fact, tell

yourself you're going to write absolute garbage, and

then give yourself permission to happily stink up your

writing room.

3. Compose instead of editing. Never, never write your

first draft with your monkey-mind sitting on your

shoulder making snide editorial comments. Composing is

a magical process. It surpasses the conscious mind by

galaxies. It's even incomprehensible to the conscious,

editorial, monkey-mind. So prepare an ambush. Sit down

at your computer or your desk. Take a deep breath and

blow out all your thoughts. Let your finger hover over

your keyboard or pick up your pen. And then pull a

fake: appear to be about to begin to write, but

instead, using your thumb and index finger of your

dominant hand, flick that little annoying ugly monkey

back into the barrel of laughs it came from. Then jump

in ? quickly! Write, scribble, scream, howl, let

everything loose, as long as you do it with a pen or

your computer keyboard.

4. Forget the first sentence. You can sweat over that

all-important one-liner when you've finished your

piece. Skip it! Go for the middle or even the end.

Start wherever you can. Chances are, when you read it

over, the first line will be blinking its little neon

lights right at you from the depths of your

composition.

5. Concentration. This is a hard one. Life throws us

so many curve balls. How about thinking about your

writing time as a little vacation from all those

annoying worries. Banish them! Create a space, perhaps

even a physical one, where nothing exists except the

single present moment. If one of those irritating

worries gets by you, stomp on it like you would an

ugly bug!

6. Stop procrastinating. Write an outline. Keep your

research notes within sight. Use someone else's

writing to get going. Babble incoherently on paper or

on the computer if you have to.

Just do it! (I know, I stole that line from

somewhere?). Tack up anything that could possibly help

you to get going: notes, outlines, pictures of your

grandmother. Put the cookie you will be allowed to eat

when you finish your first draft within sight ? but

out of reach. Then pick up the same type of writing

that you need to write, and read it. Then read it

again. Soon, trust me, the fear will slowly fade away.

As soon as it does, grab your keyboard ? and get

writing!

P.S.

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