Can we shake off the reflection of other people's opinion and find our own self-esteem power? Have you ever been convinced to walk away from your dreams by people who manage to throw enough self doubt at you to win that war of attrition? The constant day in and day out negativity that pushes you to give up your dreams and conform to something you're not?

“What are you nuts? You can't do that!” “Oh there's another hair brained scheme!” “Get Real! Go get a real job!” “Who do you think you are? You aren't something special, stick to the things you can handle.” “What are you stupid or something? Why do you think you can do that?” “How on earth are you going to accomplish that?” Lambasting you with negativity, giving you the message “Why do you think your can attain your dreams? Who are you to accomplish the things your dream may lead you to?” The litany goes on and on…

We are taught to focus on the impossibility of our dreams as adults, why things “can't be done”; to hide behind the “how” instead of understanding that the first step is to reconnect with our dreams in a magnificent flight of imagination. Don't worry about the “how” first; the means will come to you as part of the process. The question of “How are you going to do that?” is so often used as a weapon against us by negative people, proof of our “imminent failure.” We are told to prematurely focus on the “how” before the “what” stopping the process before it can even begin. The energy you generate by focusing on the what, will bring forth the how. Planning is a wonderful thing, there is nothing wrong with that, however if you focus on the fact that you “don't” know how yet, then you will miss all the possible “how's” that show up when you begin to truly entertain that dream first.

The fact of the matter is that we possess more personal power than we even know...I read a definition of personal power once that said that it is: "Your capacity to dream without limits and fulfill those dreams through your imagination." I'm afraid I do not recollect the author but I like the way they put it. The ability to manifest our own reality is the power of creation itself. I believe that developing these abilities is a gift to ourselves and the world.

Though it can be difficult, it is a worthwhile journey to re-discover those qualities within ourselves and overcome the years of being trained to deny their existence. As we grow older we are trained what to believe, how to think, limiting ourselves by dictated conditioning, which undermines our personal power. As adults our personal power is diminished.

So how do we overcome this onslaught of negativity that assaults our dreams, threatening to drown them out of existence? We must learn how to reinforce our mental immune systems. I call it “mental martial arts” ~ the ability to shatter belief systems that imprison the mind, body and spirit. We must earn our Black Belts as Dreamers!

So what is a Black Belt Dreamer? Why the concept of Mental Martial Arts and the term of “Black Belt Dreamer?” Because a Black Belt in martial arts is the highest rank of achievement in the skills of self-defense and mental discipline. In my newly published book “Becoming a Black Belt Dreamer ~ Unleash The Dream Warrior Within!” I have defined a focused, strong, step-by -process on how to stand your ground against the onslaught of daily negativity and nay-Sayers in your lives. This process utilizes martial arts philosophy and techniques, applying them to mental self defense, building up our mental immune system to fight to regain and protect that which is most precious; our ability to dream.

Perhaps it would help to give you a little history on the subject and what it means to me. In my life I have had to lean how to defend myself, not just physically, but mentally, emotionally and spiritually as well. As a child I grew up in a cult environment where I was constantly told I was worthless, useless and undeserving of love. I endured years of emotional and mental abuse. I grew up without knowing my biological father, watched helplessly as my mother was repeatedly robbed of her money and as my brother was exiled from the family at a young age. As devastating as this story sounds, it led me to one undeniable conclusion: I am a conqueror! At my lowest points in life (there's been more than one), a powerful and imaginative warrior was always there to rescue me. Now I know that warrior was me!

What started out as a passion for martial arts has expanded into far more than that, it became not just a means of learning physical self-defense and mental discipline, but also fueled my ability to defend myself spiritually and emotionally as well through the turmoil of a very restrictive and challenging upbringing. Why am I telling you this story? Because I strive to use my own experiences of oppression, abuse and isolation as real-life examples that every individual has the power to transcend any situation – as hopeless as it may seem. That is how I became The Black Belt Dreamer – fighting with resiliance to overcome, against all odds. I believe that regardless of our mistakes, traumas and tragedies, we all have an inner dream warrior that empowers us to walk through the fires of life and create the reality we truly desire.