It's true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Before the break up, you and your ex spent weeks or even months tiring of one another. You became snappier or moodier or generally less appreciative of each other ' and, when one of you finally made the decision to end it, they were convinced it would come as a relief.



But now that you've separated, you're having second thoughts.

Your girlfriend wasn't that bad.

In fact, now you come to think of it, she was pretty great.

So how are you going to go about getting her back? Below are five of the most effective options.

1. Say You're Sorry

With most break ups, both parties are to blame for whatever went wrong. Men become sullen when women nag; women nag when men become sullen ' and so you both get stuck in a vicious cycle of bad behavior.

Take responsibility for your attitude and actions. Apologize for anything you may have done wrong and assure her you didn't mean whatever nasty remarks she insists you made.

Bear in mind that women hate to admit their mistakes. There's a good chance she won't ask forgiveness for her own misdeeds, but if you really want her back, don't push the issue. Shoulder as much of the blame as you can handle and vow to make things better.

2. Leave Her Alone

Girls like strong, confident men, so give the clingy, needy act a miss.

If you've been phoning her five times a night, sending unsolicited emails and hanging around her favorite haunts on the off chance you'll get to talk to her you are doing yourself no favors. Rather than winning her affections back, all you're likely to get is a restraining order.

Show a bit of dignity. Tell her once that you would like to try again, and then leave her alone while she makes her decision.

3. Date Other Women

You may believe she's the only girl for you, but you don't have to act like it. Girls are jealous creatures ' if your ex knows you're seeing other people, she's going to start thinking about what she's missing out on. It won't be long before envy gets the better of her and she comes looking for your attention.

4. Change

Mend your ways. Whatever part you played in eroding your relationship, it probably didn't seem like that big a deal while you were doing it ' but if it led one woman to leave you, it's likely to lead any future dates to do the same.

The only way you can make things work with your ex (or any other girl you may date) is to give her a bit of what she wants. And what most girls want is a nicely scented man who listens to her problems, pulls his weight with the housework and makes her feel gorgeous getting her clothes off. Think about how you can become that guy, and then ask for another chance.

5. Befriend Her

It's not easy to be friends with someone who recently broke your heart. But if the separation was amicable or happened several months ago, call her up and invite her to the theater. Suggest a drink sometime. Hang out playing video games. Do whatever fun things you two used to do back in the early days ' just, without the sex.

Sex is the main difference between friendship and a relationship. Remind her of what a great time you have when you're together and she's soon going to realize what else it is she's been missing.