Most people think to improve their self esteems by doing fun things, by



hanging out with "up" people, by feeding themselves with positive thoughts.

Improving self esteem is much more complicated than one might think.

You could surround yourself with great people and activities, and for a

short time you might feel better. Then, the activities subside, and

you're left with you. Most people feel just as crummy about themselves

at this point as before the "activities and people." Sometimes people

feel slightly worse, because the "good stuff" is over and nothing changed.

First you need to understand how self esteem forms before changing it makes

any sense. Most people think, "Think positive" about yourself, and presto!

The result is a wonderful sense of self. Wrong. It took millions of

inputs from others and yourself about you over a very, very long time to

create what you call self esteem. In the ebook I wrote about this very

specific process, I describe when this starts, the kind of messages that

embed themselves into our awareness, how and when and why they do that,

but most importantly, what to do about it.

The average of all those messages is what we loosely call self esteem.

I call it an epiphenomenon; meaning, what emerges out of a group of smaller

phenomena that make it up. I give some visual metaphors to explain the

concept in detail, because you have to understand this one critical aspect

of self esteem formation in order to change it.

The second important idea in changing self esteem is the Anchor concept.

This is the one positive quality about you that is absolutely good, true

and unshakable. Some people have trouble finding such a trait, but I show

you how and what the qualities the Anchor Concept has to have to make it work.

It doesn't matter what the Anchor Concept is, how big it is, or how relative

it is to anything else. But we use this Anchor Concept in the technique of

repairing self esteem.

There's another misnomer going around about self esteem. To improve it you

have to "think big." This means accomplish a lot, make a million dollars,

marry and most beautiful/handsome person, hang out with high status people, etc.

This is also wrong. It matters not if you are hobnobbing with Donald Trump

or sitting alone in your living room in your pajamas. "Externals" are

relatively irrelevant to the process, although they can be used to "stir up"

issues that need to be resolved. As above, you can do this (hang out with

high status folks if it makes you feel better for a time), but when the party

is over, you're still in your own head with just you--same crummy sense of self.

The answer is to "think small." This is very counterintuitive, but if you

think about how your self esteem was created--one impression at a time--it begins

to make sense. You change the epiphenomenona of self esteem by changing each

phenomenon that created it, one at a time. This is thinking small because

you are aiming at each input, feeling, memory or association, one at a time,

which changes the big experience of self esteem, one small input at a time.

You focus on the little picture to fine tune the big picture, not the other way

around. You change your self esteem from the inside out, not from the outside in.

This is where the Anchor Concept is used.

My ebook digs into this in considerable depth and instructs you exactly how to fix

a crummy self image.

Dr Griggs.