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Mathematics In 10 Lessons

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When I was 39 I scheduled a doctor's appointment to have a lump in my left breast checked. After a mammogram, the doctor said that there appeared to be a problem on my right side. Well, being the expert in all things at that time in my life, I told them there must be a mistake. I came in for the LEFT side. They assured me that everything looked fine on the left side but there were some suspicious looking calcifications on the right. After further tests, I was diagnosed with in situ carcinoma (cancer in the breast ducts). It was very, very early and I went through six weeks of radiation.



During that time, I started reading a lot of books including Dr. Bernie Siegel's ?Love, Medicine and Miracles.? One book that really hit home was Dr. Carl Simonton's ?Getting Well Again.? There were sections in that book where I sobbed because it was like someone had been following me for 15 years and knew everything I had done and said. I learned so much. I changed dramatically and so did my life.

Several years later I was suffering from severe fatigue and terrible bruising. I was diagnosed with hairy cell leukemia. This time, chemotherapy was needed and so I went through that process. I'm proud to say that I've now been breast cancer free for 12 years and leukemia free for four years.

I learned many lessons in this journey. I share them with you so hopefully, if any of this fits, you can begin making changes in your life to avoid getting hit with the same two by four that smacked me!

1. There is no someday. There's only now. There's a story called ?Precious Present? which talks about a mysterious man telling of an elusive present. The point of the story is that being ?present? by enjoying the moments in your life is the best gift of all. It's good to plan for the future, but remember to LIVE TODAY. Don't put off playing with the kids, using your best china, doing all those things you want to do ?someday.? We truly do not know what tomorrow brings. Be aware of what's happening, really listen to others and trust your instincts. Your life can be so much richer by learning to be present even for just a few minutes each day.

2. Own and express your true feelings. For most of my life, I would do things I didn't want to do. I always worried about saying no to others. When I got the leukemia I knew that the fatigue wasn't just from the disease. It was also from 20 years of pent-up resentment for doing things and going places because I felt I ?had? to. I've learned to express my feelings. Now I say no to things that I don't want to do. But I also tell people I love them more often. I tell my kids ?I'm sorry? when I've made mistakes (and I make plenty!) I talk to others about my fears, my depression (which plagued me for years) and my failures as well as my successes. Being honest has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. Interestingly, in the process of becoming more direct, I've become kinder. There's no resentment when you speak from the heart.

3. I'm not a victim. I choose how I react to situations. Sometimes people ask ?Why me?? Except for a brief moment, I didn't travel down that road. I knew there were lessons I needed to learn. Yes, some days just plain sucked with nausea and fatigue, but I also knew that many others have symptoms 1000 times worse than mine. When you're open to the lessons, you can move through your situation so much easier and faster.

4. Take care of myself first. When traveling on airplanes we always hear that in case of emergencies to put on our oxygen mask first, THEN take care of others. That's a major life lesson. If we don't take care of ourselves first, then we have nothing to give others. I had excellent doctors, but I've learned that I need to know my body and what it needs. All aspects of our life are our responsibility. Get to know you. If you feel better after eating protein, eat it. If you need 8 hours of sleep a night, find a way to get it. You'll function much better because that's what YOU need?not what a book recommends. It's the same with emotions (see #2). Speak from your heart. And spiritually, find the path that's right for you. It all comes together to make a wonderful YOU, and then you can be there for others.

5. Ask for help. Sell the SuperWoman cape on ebay! Asking for help gives others a chance to share their gifts and love. Plus, you'll weigh less because the ?I have to do everything? cape is really heavy.

6. Watch your words and especially your thoughts. I believe that our ?thoughts create.? With my cancer, I KNEW I was going to be cancer-free. But earlier in my life I was very critical, judgmental and negative. Watch your words and thoughts for an hour. Did you say or think thoughts like ?I'm always tired,? ?We can't afford that,? ?I could never do that?? If you keep thinking or saying those things, guess what shows up in your life? Yep?You are tired, you can't afford that item and you'll never do that. I challenge you to eliminate the negatives. Guard your words. They are powerful.

7. There is a reason for all things. Many times things happen in our lives and we don't understand. We are a small cog in a much bigger picture. Just trust and stay positive. As you get older, you'll smile at how you've weaved this beautiful tapestry called ?My Life.?

8. Get rid of stress. Stress is toxic and it can lead to serious health problems ? physically and emotionally. If you are in a stressful situation, GET OUT of it -- whether it's an abusive relationship, a terrible job, or living in a place or city you don't like. Stress eventually wins by wearing you out. So read #9.

9. If you don't like your life, change it! This and #8 are easier said than done, but if you want a happier and healthier life, start making some changes. If you are thinking defeating thoughts, work on creating more positive affirmations. If you've always wanted to learn how to play the piano, start taking lessons. If you've always wanted your own home business, find something that sounds fun and start it! As the saying goes, ?Life is like a buffet table. You can have whatever you want, but you've got to get up and go get it.? And go back and read #5 and ask for help from people you trust.

10. Laugh often. Don't take life so seriously. All of us have challenges. Don't get upset and angry. Laugh more and know that ?This too shall pass.?

11. (Bonus Lesson) Reread these often. Life has a way of intruding and making us forget what we've learned. Print this off and re-read it often.

You deserve happiness, love, peace and joy.

Don't let anyone or anything steal that. Blessings?
Mathematics In 10 Lessons
Looking back as an adult child of aging parents, I realized there were so many things I picked up as we moved together through time. Hopefully, those that matter most have stuck even though far more have fallen away.

That's not good or bad, so I refuse to get all guilt-ridden now that my parents are gone. Yet, I'll probably always wonder what flew completely over my head as I was focusing on something far less significant. Oh well. It's all part of living the lives we were given.

Life's full of lessons. Those our parents taught us about aging usually had nothing to do with aging. They just had to do with living . . which is what aging's all about anyway.

In any case, I've come up with 10 lessons I learned from my mom and dad about living my way through to growing older. These will probably sound fairly familiar to you, since most folks kind of see them as "universal truths" of a sort. I'll let you decide for yourself.

Of course, this is just a small list about one point in time (i.e., NOW), and it's not at all complete. And I'm sure I'll realize other teachings worthy of gathering up and letting go as I move farther along in life. That's the great part. You're not fully done learning till you die . . and then the learning starts all over again as those who come after us pick through all we've had to share.

So, here is my list of 10 lessons (in no particular order of priority) I learned from my mother and father about aging well. See how many resonate with you, as well:

1. Aging is about wising up, not dumbing down. Why on earth do so many seemingly smart people assume that the more gray hairs and wrinkles one accumulates, the more stupid one becomes? That's just nuts! Granted not everyone grows wiser as they grow older. We all know wisdom has nothing to do with the numbers of age. However, if you treat someone as wise you might just be surprised by how much wisdom's hiding inside that wrinkley gray person. In other words, Golden Rule time: Treat old folks as you want to be treated when you're old because before you know it, you will be.

2. If a belief - no matter how seemingly sacred - doesn't support the person you're becoming, let it go and move on. Life's full of foolish, and even harmful, beliefs that serve no one's best interest. If it's something you question, set it aside to visit later when you know more about yourself and the world. If it's something that fails to build or reinforce a self image that truly reflects the person you're becoming, then by all means let it go! Life's too full to give what limited room we have to the stuff that drags us down.

3. Stop struggling to be the person you thought you wanted to be when you were 20, and get comfortable with the incredible person you really are now. If you're not who you thought you were going to be, so be it. Be grateful. That life could have been much worse than the one you've spent all these years shaping to fit the real you.

4. No one's perfect. No parent. No child. No spouse. No true love. No One is perfect. Which, in and of itself IS perfect since each of us is just imperfect enough for most others to get along with - and some to love. Perfection's far over-rated in the human species. Striving for perfection is great. However, given its over-rated-ness, climbing all over ourselves for not reaching it each time is a major waste of time and energy . . which are both far better devoted to other pursuits.

5. The primary focus of life's second half is to let go of all the crap we spent far too much time in the first half accumulating. Letting go is a gift of successful aging. Few of us realize in the first half how little of the stuff we fought so hard to get we truly need to live well.

6. You become what you believe, so believe the best about yourself and everyone around you. If you see good, and expect good, good will surround you. What you put out into the universe, is what you'll get back from the universe (i.e., the Law of Attraction). That doesn't mean there will never be pain in your life. It does, however, mean that the pain won't overtake you and be an end in itself.

7. You don't stop growing till you're dead, unless you stop growing beforehand. Life's to be lived till it's done with you, not the other way around. But it needs a little help. Hanging out in front of the television all day isn't living. Get out and do something to make a difference. Make someone else's life better, and you'll be surprised how much better your own life will become. Stretch your mind as well as your body. Keep learning. And keep sharing that learning.

8. Hang out with positive people. They rub off.

9. Friends are precious, and they disappear way too soon. Do what you can - whatever you have to - to stay in touch. Life's much too short to willingly let your world grow smaller.

10. Let he / she who controls the purse strings pay the bills. It's way too difficult the other way. Money's a necessity in today's world. Unfortunately, far too many people see it as the most important part of living a good life, when in fact it often creates far more damage than it fixes. Use money as the tool it is. Let it make your life better, but don't depend on it to make your life better. Only you can do that.

11. If you hurt someone, ask forgiveness. If someone hurts you, give forgiveness. Remember that a world of one is a very lonely world indeed, so keep the doors of your life wide open. Aging's a lot more fun for everyone when it's a party and the whole world's invited.

Okay, so there were eleven. And that's obviously not the end. My parents taught me a great deal that's worth holding on to. I'll bet yours have as well. When you have a chance, make a list for yourself. It's a good thing to have on hand.
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About Author
Both Donna Davis & Gail Mcconnon are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.

Donna Davis has sinced written about articles on various topics from Marketing Tool, Web Development and Sales and Negotiation. Donna Davis lives in Tucson, AZ with her husband Bill, their two sons and two dogs. Donna has owned several successful businesses and loves coaching others. To learn more about Donna, her current business and how she helps others achieve their dreams vi. Donna Davis's top article generates over 33100 views. Bookmark Donna Davis to your Favourites.

Gail Mcconnon has sinced written about articles on various topics from Family, self improvement and motivation and Aging. An expert on "letting go in aging," Gail McConnon coaches successful midlife adults who are ready and open to no longer being locked. Gail Mcconnon's top article generates over 2400 views. Bookmark Gail Mcconnon to your Favourites.
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