First you should realize the the reason your marriage is or has broken up is probably because of a lack of communication by one or both of the people in the relationship. That and being self centered is why we are experiencing such a surge in divorces these days.



The positive steps that you can take to save your marriage are really about using plain old common sense and by thinking with logic instead of emotion.

Even though that may seem like an impossible thing to do right now with all of the heartache you may be feeling, saving your marriage should be of the utmost importance to you at this point.

Step #1. I know that the natural instinct is to constantly call or visit the other person to try to get back together but this isn't the way to do it. You need to stop being so pushy and stop pushing the other person.

They need room to think without being bombarded with sobbing phone calls. Just relax and stop the contact, let them call you when they are ready which generally won't take long.

They will probably wonder why you halted your communication with them causing the other person to be overly curious about what you are doing now. It will scare them enough to want to re-start contact with you.

Step #2 Stay calm and relaxed after you have made contact and don't overdo it. Talking a couple of times a week is more than enough. You don't want to push the other person away and when you are talking, and especially stay away from the blame game.

That's an easy trap to fall into and should be avoided at all costs. If this start to happen just stop the communication until you both calm down and then make an agreement with each other that you won't go there again.

Step #3 Once you have been talking nicely to each other for some time without fighting, the two of you could decide to go out for a short meeting, NOT a date but a casual get together.

Something that is not a date but more a casual meeting for a short time like a picnic or movie that you both would enjoy. DO NOT go through all the stuff that caused the breakup but think of the enjoyment of each others company.

Try to visualize the way it was when you first met each other and the attraction you felt for each other, that's where you want your mind to be.

It can be a difficult process to save your marriage but in the long run it is well worth the effort that you put into it.

Having a husband or wife that has pure unconditional love for you is the most enjoyable thing that we will ever experience in our lifetimes.