So many great women today go through the pain and frustration of wondering why their men suddenly stop keeping in touch, especially even when the past few dates they've had were actually great. There seems no apparent reason for the man's sudden withdrawal, and nothing they do seems to rekindle the fire in their relationship. What's worse, this sudden withdrawal seems to happen to almost every single man they go out with.
If you're reading this article, then chances are that you've experienced something like this before. And chances are also that you've tried fixing the problem, only to make it worse. What's going on?
Here's why ? most great, independent men out there don't have any trouble living out their lives. They're successful, intelligent, witty, and basically get along fine with everyone they meet. They seem to be the perfect lifetime partners, and it's easy for men to see this.
Unfortunately, not all women are as independent and easygoing as these men, but that doesn't stop them from pretending to be. After all, if they catch his attention, it's all that matters, right?
Actually, it almost never works that way. It's not easy (nor is it right) to pretend to be someone else, and sooner or later these women have to drop the act and present themselves as who they really are. Naturally, this shocks the men out of their skins and make them do the first thing that comes to their minds ? and that's to withdraw from the relationship altogether.
It's natural for women to try to get the relationship back together, but they make so many common mistakes that they only succeed in making things worse. For instance, when he does make a phone call, all she does is complain about how he's hurt her feelings. That's not going to oblige him to stay ? and even if it does, it's only a recipe for more problems in the future.
It doesn't have to be this way, though. You can change the outcome of these great dates. Instead of seeing him withdraw and end the relationship just like that, you can have him actually come after you. And it all starts within yourself.
You'll need to find whatever it is that's keeping you from feeling independent and confident. Is it debts? A few extra pounds? A fear of rejection? Whatever it is, you'll have to fix the problem so you can better show yourself to him as a woman who reflects his own character ? laid-back and easygoing.
When you catch his attention by being independent, the next thing you need to do is to keep his attention ? and you can do this by being playful. For instance, when he calls you after a long period of inactivity, don't lash out at him at why he hasn't kept in touch! Instead, be genuinely happy and excited to hear from him, and go ahead and suggest to hang out again sometime soon. Emphasis on genuine ? if you still have to pretend that you're happy, then there's still something askew in the inner you.
The rule of thumb is this: You need to be independent and playful to catch the attention of the great men out there. Men would want their future relationships to be fun, and if you show him that you can help bring the fun into a relationship, then there won't be any reason for him to stop calling you up.
Streets Keep Calling Me
If it isn't bad enough that you've lost your job or been out of work due to illness and the bills are piling up, now you've got to deal with phone calls from debt collectors who may even impose on you at work.
If you've ever been in this position, you know how hard it is to dig out. Once your debt goes into collection, they only way you may be able to get it out is to pay it in full - something you obviously are not able to do at the moment. While many will let you setup a payment plan, they may still barrage you with calls until the debt is paid off.
Now, not every debt collector is a monster. Many of these people are just doing their jobs but you must understand that they have probably heard every story in the book from the people they phone. Plus many work on a commission and some can get a bit aggressive in their demeanor. It's easy to see how one could become intimidated by these frequent calls.
One thing you can do to take control of the situation is to know what debt collectors are and are not allowed to do. Debt collectors are allowed to contact you, of course. They may phone you, contact you by mail, telegram or fax and they also may even contact you in person. They are also allowed to phone you at work as well as at home, unless they know that your employer does not approve of calls. They cannot contact you before 8 in the morning or after 9 at night, unless you have given them prior permission to do so.
One thing that most people do not know is that you can get the debt collector to stop contacting you simply by writing a letter asking them to stop. Once you do this, they may contact you one more time to advise you of further actions. Of course, you still must make good on the debt. If you feel that the debt charges are in error then you should state as such in the letter.
Contrary to the horror stories you may have heard, debt collectors are not allowed to harass you. They are not allowed to threaten or abuse you or anyone you know in order to get ?to you? nor are they allowed to call you repeatedly. They cannot threaten you with legal action or wage garnishment unless they are allowed by law and actually intend to follow through.
If you feel that you have been harassed or want to report an agent, get in contact with the Federal Trade Comission. They set the policies and will know what is allowed and what is not.
Both Aaron Adams & Lee Dobbins are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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