I prefer to be my own boss. I prefer to set my own schedule every day of the week. I prefer to work with people who are decisive and respond quickly. How did I discover my preferences? Through experiencing contrast - external events that didn't feel good - I gained the opportunity to become clear about what I love to do and how I love to do it.



What do I mean by contrast? If you smell something that doesn't smell good to you, that's contrast. If something costs more than you thought it would, that's contrast. If someone treats you rudely, that's contrast. Anything that doesn't feel good produces contrast.

Contrast is a prompt that something is unfinished, unexamined, or out of balance. It's a neutral term for your experience of external events that awaken your desire for change.

Contrast is essential.

Without contrast, we would remain clueless about ourselves and not make decisions.

Through experiencing contrast, I have discovered that working with indecisive people is a drain on my energy. Feeling tired, worn down, even exhausted is in contrast to the feelings I experience when I work with people who easily make a decision and stick with it. Decisive people energized me. As long as I ignored the contrast, I continued to attract clients who drained me. Finally, I'd experienced enough contrast to make a decision: I want to work with people who are decisive. Without the contrast, I would not have been able to make this decision and would still be attracting less-than-ideal clients.

Resistance slows the flow.

So why doesn't it just happen? Why does it take so long? What can we do to make it happen faster? Why do we continue to experience stuff we don't like?

If we could relax, joyfully expect our desires to be fulfilled, and enjoy life as it unfolds, all our desires would be manifested in seemingly record time. But most of us have beliefs and feelings operating inside us that resist the wonderful desires of our heart.

So, contrast is a neutral term for the experience of external events that awaken our desire for change. Anything that doesn't feel good produces contrast. Contrast is essential-without it we wouldn't make decisions.